samba53211 Reviews

Mommy Is a Murderer (2020)

Film-making for beginners

[1/10 · 6 May 2022]

There's really no need for another negative review. Others here have already eviscerated the movie, which it deserves. So I'll ignore the poor acting, poor script, and "Juvenile Shop." Actually that last reminds me of a scene in, I think, "Repo Man," where all the beer (or soda) cans in the fridge are labeled "Beverage." However a couple of nitpicky things are nonetheless worth mentioning:

1. The title. The mother doesn't actually murder anyone, although she tries.

2. The girl is supposed to be 8 years old. That is much too old to have tea parties. In those scenes, she seems more like 4 or 5.

Nobody's Looking (2019)

Fun Idea Gone Wrong

[4/10 · 18 October 2021]

I liked the concept very much. Too bad the acting, or rather over-acting, is deplorable. I don't know, maybe it's supposed to be a farce. I never did understand farce. I only got as far as partway through the 6th episode, because the whistling became unbearable. Seriously, what was that about?

Somewhere (2010)

Snoozefest start to finish

[1/10 · 28 July 2021]

According to IMDb, "a passionless Hollywood actor reexamines his life when his eleven-year-old daughter surprises him with a visit." That could have been interesting, only he doesn't. Two scenes sum up just how dull this film and its main character are. First scene: our hero hires twin pole dancers to entertain him in his hotel room and FALLS ASLEEP by the end of their routine. Second scene: he takes his daughter to her skating lesson, and she skates her choreographed routine. The entire routine, not merely the few seconds needed to establish it as a father-daughter bonding activity.

Then there are the plot tokens that are never cashed in: he breaks his arm; he receives anonymous hateful text messages; he might or might not have a black SUV following him.

I watched the entire film just to find out if anything happens. I'm not a cruel person, so I'll spare you: nothing happens.

The Frankenstein Chronicles (2015–2017)

What could possibly explain season 2?

[5/10 · 15 April 2021]

I have a theory: Season 1's writers all died, and for season 2, the producers hired a team of monkeys and sat them all down at typewriters. The first episode of season 2 is complete gibberish. I couldn't even write spoilers if I wanted to, because I literally had no idea what was going on.

My 5 stars was for season 1, which was a perfectly respectable detective story.

The Irregulars (2021)

Not Your Grandmother's Sherlock Holmes

[3/10 · 12 April 2021]

First: OK, I have not read the graphic novel this is based on, but presumably there should be SOME connection with Arthur Conan Doyle's Holmes. Ouija boards? Ghosts? Supernatural powers? Come on! Holmes's detective work was based on science not mumbo jumbo!

Second: Dr. Watson is not sinister.

Third: This is a period piece, but the soundtrack is weird-modern.

I gave it 3 stars for the acting and costumes. But I refuse to watch any more than 2 episodes.

Heartland (II) (2007– )

Can we please kill off Lou?

[10/10 · 1 April 2021]

Sorry, that headline might make you think I hate the show, but actually I'm loving it, for all the same reasons others have mentioned. Heartwarming, wonderful acting, good stories. But honestly, Lou and Tim and just plain insufferable. They're both self-centered, passive-aggressive, and frequently bullies.

That said, the real reason I watch the show is the horses. I can't get enough of those beautiful horses. And the horsemanship. At first I thought there was some camera trickery going on or a stunt double for sure. So I looked up Amber Marshall's (Amy) bio and learned she's a bona fide equestrian. I love watching her ride.

Jingle Jangle: A Christmas Journey (2020)

Too much cognitive dissonance for me

[6/10 · 20 December 2020]

I'm afraid I didn't get very far in watching this film. It's a musical with a period setting and costumes but contemporary singing and dance styles. It just doesn't work for me.

That doesn't make me a hater or lacking in imagination.

2012 (I) (2009)

Set the bar low, and it works

[5/10 · 15 August 2020]

I keep my expectations low for disaster films, so I wasn't as disappointed as some reviewers. The special effects took center stage and precluding character development, par for the course for disaster flicks. And it's SF, so we're expected to suspend disbelief. But we can suspend only so much.

I take issue with the science on 2 crucial points. First, there's a finite amount of water on the planet, so there's no way that sea level can rise everywhere so all land is submerged. Second, The final scene is a year later, when the water is receding and the continents are starting to re-emerge. But if all land was submerged for a year, the global ecosystem would have been utterly destroyed. No plants sustaining land animals and insects or re-oxygenating the atmosphere.

How Do You Know (2010)

Such pleasant stars. What could possibly go wrong?

[2/10 · 11 July 2020]

It looked so promising. Reese Witherspoon, Paul Rudd, and Owen Wilson are all pros at rom com (although Wilson always plays himself, which is no huge achievement), and yet there was precious little comedy and no romance. Sure, off-screen humping, but no chemistry in any of the pairings. The only relationship even slightly interesting was the father-son relationship. On top of that, the three main characters are beyond a mess, without even the excuse of being very young and inexperienced in relationships. I'm not sure I've ever seen three characters so uncomfortable in their own skin. There IS such a thing as apologizing too much.

The oddest thing about this film is the delivery of lines. It's clearly deliberate, since all the characters are doing it. By "it" I mean they deliver their lines haltingly, as if they're seeing the script for the first time. Or as if the actors can't quite believe what they're being made to say. It reminds me of a stand-up comic who hasn't yet learned the timing of a joke. Or worse, gets the punch line wrong and then tries to fix it. It's embarrassing. Witherspoon and Rudd are so much better than this and were so even 10 years ago when the film came out.

The clincher is that every moment of the film is predictable. Bleh.

The Dinner (I) (2017)

Apple product placement?

[1/10 · 30 June 2020]

If you want to know how awful this movie is-it's dreadful, folks-just read the other reviews. After slogging through the movie all the way to the non-end, I have the stamina to make just 2 points:

1. Whoever is responsible for sound effects should be punished for inserting Apple notification pings THROUGHOUT. (A suitable punishment might be making them watch the movie.) At one point I actually paused the movie to figure out whether I was actually getting notifications or the sound was in the movie. I can only assume the point of that was to put viewers on edge.

2. So the whole discussion of whether the little monsters will get away with their crime and whether they should get away with it? Will it all blow over? Yeah, maybe the police won't think to watch the ATM's security camera footage.

White Night Wedding (2008)

Sad is the new funny, I guess.

[2/10 · 13 January 2020]

I don't get why anybody thinks this is a comedy. Comedies are funny. Is it different in Iceland? Well acted but unrelentingly depressing.

Lost Girl (2010–2016)

All the subtlety of a Harlequin romance

[4/10 · 18 December 2019]

The story is interesting enough to keep me watching despite all the negatives: (1) heaving bosoms every 2 min. (I guess so we don't forget); (2) every sex scene is exactly the same-there's no such thing as tender lovemaking, just thrusting, panting, and tearing clothes off; (3) painful overacting by most of the actors; (4) strong female lead, saddled with the title "lost girl"; (5) aside from the cops and the bar owner, how are the characters paying for their expansive wardrobes?

On the plus side, the dialogue is occasionally witty. The "demon with a good heart" story has been told many times: Angel (in "Buffy" and "Angel"), Dexter, Loki (maybe). This sucubus version makes for an interesting story.

A Brilliant Young Mind (2014)

Afternoon Special-ish

[7/10 · 3 November 2019]

This movie was disappointing in several ways. First, Asa Butterfield is a fine actor, but his talent was wasted in this film, given that he barely spoke. Second, there were subplots that were thoroughly pointless, since they didn't advance the story in any way (the side story of the other autistic kid, who washes out because he's not good enough at math and the romance between Nathan's mom and his teacher). Third, and biggest, disappointment: the film can't decide whether Nathan is autistic or not. Autistic children are not miraculously cured following flashbacks to traumatic events. An autistic child who can't tolerate being touched and who's never expressed love for his mother isn't suddenly going to allow her to hug him and stroke and kiss his face, and he's certainly not going to initiate physical contact by taking her hand. I would love to see thoughtful films about autistic children, but they have to be informed as well. This one wasn't.

Benjamin (II) (2019)

Dreck

[1/10 · 30 October 2019]

The only good thing I can say about this movie is that it gave me an opportunity to use the word dreck, which I think is a funny word. Way funnier than this movie. The acting was truly awful. I mean high school awful, and I'm being a bit unfair to high school students here. I agree with the other reviewer who cried, "Make it stop!" And so I did.

Many Sides of Jane (2019)

Is she or isn't she? Who knows.

[1/10 · 23 October 2019]

I wanted to like the show. And that's the thing; this is done like a reality show, not a documentary. Every moment of it sounds completely scripted. I think DID is real, and I'd like to see a real documentary on it. For all I know, Jane is for real, but she doesn't come across that way because of the reality-show treatment of her, including all the scripted drama. Assuming Jane IS real, the show does her a disservice. I didn't even make it to the end of episode 1 and won't be watching any more.

The Laundromat (I) (2019)

Informative yes, but also cheesy

[5/10 · 22 October 2019]

For the life of me, I can't understand why this was made as a dark comedy. I didn't know about this scandal before seeing the movie; I do think it's a very important subject, but it deserved a more serious treatment. Turning it into a comedy will allow many viewers to dismiss it as mere entertainment. And if it had to be a comedy, why such a cheesy comedy? Especially the very last 5 seconds of the film: beyond cheesy.

The performances surprised me: Meryl Streep was terrible. Some director needs to tell her to stop doing the darting-eyes thing. David Schwimmer, who did not play it for laughs, was excellent. I hope to see him do more drama down the road.

Emergence (2019–2020)

So far so . . . great!

[10/10 · 10 October 2019]

Cute kid, interesting story with potential up the wazoo, yes, yes. But that's not what prompted this review. It's Allison. I loved Allison Tolman in Good Girls, and it's wonderful to see her in a leading role. She's an amazing comedic talent, with a just-the-right-amount-expressive face and perfect timing. I think this'll be one time the adorable child actor won't upstage the adult lead. Can't wait to see how the show unfolds.

Surviving R. Kelly (2019–2023)

Important documentary-if only it were better done

[8/10 · 22 September 2019]

I'm very glad this documentary was made. Not sure Kelly would ever get what's coming to him without it. But aside from issues of justice, it was very informative regarding how sexual predators actually work. I see parallels between R. Kelly and Charles Manson, both being master manipulators of underage girls.

That said, I could only bear to watch 3 episodes because of all the repetition. In what way does it make for good storytelling to hear the main characters repeat the same lines over and over and over? Enough already! It's as if the producers simply don't have enough material to fill up the number of episodes they've decided on, so we're subjected to all this filler.

Another Life (2019–2021)

I made it all the way through 6 episodes!

[2/10 · 30 July 2019]

Whatsamatta with all you people (other reviewers)? Don't you know force feeding yourself rotten SF builds character? And yet somehow I don't really feel the improvement.

I gave this show 2 stars because Katee Sackhoff is in it. For the life of me, I can't understand why she agreed to do it. They must've promised her a plot.

I'm not going to rehash the idiocy of sending immature 12-going-on-20-somethings on a space mission to make first contact, because every other review has already nailed that one. So let's focus on the movie's premise. The crew's mission is to go find the source of the artifact the aliens left on Earth. But what exactly will they do once the find aliens? They will "start a dialog." That's it. Gee, maybe we should just try that here; we could end all war.

I wanted to like this show, but there's so little to it: lots of idiotic bickering, one disaster after another, and zero character development.

Timeless (2016–2018)

Entertaining as well as thought-provoking

[9/10 · 28 July 2019]

The format of the show lends itself well to a variety of interesting scenarios and the occasional musical performance. The acting is great all around. So why 9 stars from me instead of 10? Two problems. First, I found the speed with which the team figures out what the bad guys are after implausible. Likewise the fact that a historian who seems to have heard of everyone who ever lived AND knows minute details of their lives. Might have been more plausible if she'd been presented as having a photographic memory.

Second, the script is a little sloppy in places, e.g., two characters saying "calvary" when they mean "cavalry" and Lucy, a historian who should know better, saying Suffragette Movement. "Suffragette" was a derogatory nickname for women in the Suffrage Movement. There was no such thing as the Suffragette Movement.

However, neither problem is enough to ruin the show for me, not even close. The mystery is gripping, and I find myself caring about the characters and wanting to see things work out for them.

Mary Poppins Returns (2018)

Disappointed

[3/10 · 14 July 2019]

Unlike most of the other reviewers, I didn't watch this to be enchanted by Mary Poppins again. I watched it because I'm a fan of Emily Mortimer. Unfortunately her talent was completely wasted.

Emily Blunt has a good voice, but the sweetness we expect of Mary Poppins just wasn't there. As others have mentioned, there wasn't a single song you could remember 5 minutes after the movie ended. Meryl Streep and Dick Van Dyke were perfect. Who knew Dick Van Dyke could still dance at his age? The rest of the cast overacted so much you'd think they were on a stage half a mile from their audience.

Some of the choreography was nice, although it was a shame when it took place in dim lighting.

Delhi Crime (2019– )

Wish I could give more than 10 stars

[10/10 · 8 May 2019]

The show, which I binge-watched, was superb and heartbreaking. I won't repeat all the comments by other reviewers here, but I will add that it was fascinating to observe some of the differences between Indian and American police procedures. For example, the Delhi police didn't use handcuffs on or mirandize suspects.

Subtitles would have been helpful at times, but I managed to make out most of it.

Married at First Sight (2014– )

Deeply flawed premise

[2/10 · 3 March 2019]

The premise of the show seems to be taking an old tradition of arranged marriage and applying science to it.

First, the show pretends to be a scientific experiment, but the "science" is social science, and there don't seem to be any real scientific principles applied in order to predict good outcomes."I think they could have a successful marriage because they want similar things" is NOT science, folks.

Second, the "scientists" seem incapable of telling when someone is lying.

Third, what exactly was the success rate of traditional arranged marriages anyway? Shouldn't scientists ask whether that tradition is worth emulating? And do so BEFORE building an elaborate experiment?

Fourth, to the extent that arranged marriages work at all, the family relationships play a HUGE role, and that starts long before the marriage. In the show, the sociologists are substituting for the families, which doesn't work, because the sociologists have no skin in the game. Other than producing an entertaining show.

I think I might have been able to stomach the show if they hadn't pretended that what they're doing is science. And if they'd selected more mature candidates. The men and women selected are all so immature it's a wonder they can even hold down jobs let alone stumble their way to happiness in an arranged marriage. I can only hope none of those women get pregnant.

Saving Hope (2012–2017)

Shallow characters, meh script

[4/10 · 2 July 2017]

I usually like medical shows, but this one has some serious flaws . . . Aside from the fact that it's no "Gray's Anatomy" or even "ER." I started watching it because I was a big fan of Stargate. Michael Shanks played a likable enough character on that show, but that was 10 years ago, so I rather expected him to have more depth as an actor by now. Unfortunately he's quite flat as Charlie Harris. Then there are all the unlikeable characters on the show: Alex, who falls in and out of love like a 12-year-old (compare her to Dawn Bell, who has real depth); Dr. Murphy, who's a clone of Sweets from the show "Bones"and just as naive and vulnerable; Charlie Harris, an overbearing, self-important control freak; Joel Goran, who has no impulse control whatsoever; Dr. Lin, a real throw-away character in this ensemble. The saving graces in this show are the performances of Michelle Nolden as Dr. Bell, and Huse Madhavji as Dr. Hamza.

The only thing different about this show is the supernatural element: Dr. Harris sees and talks to ghosts. That does nothing for me, but with the current emphasis on the supernatural and superheroes, I get why did it. However, what in the world is up with the glowing blue light that invades almost every scene?!! It is just so annoying; I can't understand why anyone would introduce such a distracting element.

And why don't these doctors know how to use birth control?!!

I'll probably continue binge-watching to the bitter end, if only to see the characters get what's coming to them.

Father Brown (2013– )

Enjoy the series for what it is

[7/10 · 6 June 2017]

I'm enjoying the Father Brown series despite some serious flaws in it. As other reviewers have mentioned, the show is entertaining fluff. Some of the acting is good (some isn't), the priest is sincere (I like him despite his smugness toward atheists), and the scenery and settings are exquisite.

I have only two complaints: The show is full of caricatures. There's the cougar (Lady Felicia), the ignorant and intolerant church lady (Mrs. McCarthy, whose solution to every problem is a cup of tea), the cocky young male (Sid), and various lecherous old geezers. My second complaint is that the show too often comes off like an English farce—nudge, nudge, wink, wink. Every time an important clue is presented, there's sure to be an exaggerated wink or a pregnant pause to make absolutely sure the audience pays the proper attention.

As long as you're not expecting serious drama or much in the way of character development—I think it would be cool for at least Father Brown to grow—you won't be disappointed.