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barkingmad-hound
Reviews
The Rise & Fall of a White Collar Hooligan (2012)
Embarrassing and clichéd
The back-story had potential, but the poor script and clichéd scenes ruined it! The main character's voice over has been done to death, and some potential comedy one liners were just cringe worthy. Every word is a swear word, not sure people really speak to each other like that, and the acting is mediocre at best, the girlfriend is as wooden as a park bench and delivers her lines like a robot... the main character who narrates the story is probably the best actor.
The hooligan link is quite meaningless and adds absolutely no value to the story, except that the guy meets the main character when they're getting involved in brawls. However, as they're trying to keep a low profile, I would say having rucks in streets isn't the best way to go below the radar.
If you need cheering up, watch for comedy value if nothing else.
The Wicker Man (2006)
So dire, I think I may need counselling
I will make this short, as most reviewers have summed this bag of sh1te up already! Have to say, if I was reviewing a comedy, it would've done pretty well! Both the script and the acting is appalling, nothing short of insulting to the original.
And where do I start? Too many questions.. 1 - how come when Cage gets to meet the Sister Summersisle, he has been in the water, rolled down hills and run away from bees, yet his suit looks perfectly pressed?
2 - How come he offered to help the mute man put a couple of logs back on his cart, yet when the rest fell off, Cage walked away cos the man happened to be mute?
3 - Why did he have a major allergic reaction to the bees, and nearly died, yet when talking to the Sister, as the bees were flying into him, it didn't have any reaction?
4 - why did the pregnant women he encountered walking in the wood, look like they had hidden jumpers up their dresses?
5 - why does he show no sign of hypothermia or weakness after getting out of a full of water well he has just spent hours?
6 - why does he shout continuously lines like "how did it get burned?" repeatedly
6 - Why is he so thick and exceedingly stupid?
Far too many more to list. And in all honesty, at least for those who love the original, we had some empathy for Edward Woodward's character - but actually i couldn't care less what happened to Nic's character because he was so awful and unlikeable, with a real arrogant attitude and a clear hatred of women
Terrible - 1 out of 10 for sticking to the original font on the title, nothing else