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The Night They Came Home (2024)
dog water film
The opening scene features an african american man reading a bible have an monologue about how beautiful life is before you die.
This is an attempted bio-pic of the Rufus Buck gang and it's impact on the Muskogee and Okmulgee areas of Oklahoma.
However, this movie makes no attempt to clarify who is who or how their paths became interwoven. At one point I even considered that perhaps this director was seeking to feature black actors in to roles of native americans.
The lack of explanation and the directors choice to abstain from any explanation fueled the sloppiness of this story. Even place cards detailing the date and place of each of the set pieces could have elucidated that this was attempting to tell a real story. However the scene jumping, the bad acting, the terrible dialogue, the lack of chemistry, and the randomly introduced then killed characters...makes this movie fairly unwatchable.
I watched till the 40 minute mark under the pretense that the Rufus was a native american who just looked black. It wasn't until the confusion, forcing me to do an internet search for the historicity of the "Rufus buck gang" did I realize that this was just a terrible movie and not at all a recasting like the wiz.
Can someone pull this directors...director's license?
The Bricklayer (2023)
Bad Dialogue
I think Aaron Eckhart is good. I know he doesn't do great films but I don't think he gets enough credit for the films he does do.
This film however was marred by bad dialogue. I mean cliche riff to cliche riff...I'm surprised they didn't throw an, "I'll be back" in there just to complete the insane laziness that this film was written with.
Then the on screen chemistry between Eckhart and Nina Dobrev was putrid. In one scene she literally giggled like a school girl at one of Eckhart's cheese ball lines...but yet they both are professional assassins/spies. Yawn.
The story itself wasn't terrible...if you strip some of those cheese ball lines out.
Oh and brick laying....it literally played no role in movie at all....not in the way that other movies incorporated some passed-life-skill into the movie.
Horrible waste of time.
Spider-Man: Across the Spider-Verse (2023)
Waste
This movie was convoluted as a it could be.
First 10 minutes are set up for gwen.
Next 35 minutes are set up for Multiverse.
Next 30 minutes are set up for Miles's actual story arch.
We finally arrive at the rising action about 1 hr and 30 minutes into the movie. With climax being...dun dun dun...to be continued.
This movie was awful.
They over played the art style. Like really, each universe needs its own art style. Truth be told it detracted from the story. I had to revisit portions because I was taking out of the story by the obnoxious flickering and flowing colors. It worked in the last one cause you used one back ground. But when the background becomes a character...you have no story.
And whats more, your main villain is a good guy who will switch to reluctantly following Miles in the next film...who knows, maybe even laying his life down cause Miles made him a believer.
YAWN!!! I had to switch to different activities 4 times in this movie because that is how unwatchable this film is.
The one compelling character, Spider-punk, was so authentic he is incomprehensible by american audiences. I watch tons of english set films, but they literally had spider-punk mumble his cockney. Absolutely the worst spiderman film ever.
Guillermo del Toro's Pinocchio (2022)
Great retelling
I think the initial animation style flirts hard with the uncanny valley. But the story itself I think was great. The moral of this story seems to be understood throughout the retelling. "Life if precious and impermanent, cherish life while it's here."
I think the initial awakening of Pinocchio was almost unbearable, but it also endeared the Pinocchio youth to you as you realized that he would always be perfectly gullible for the whole movie.
The villains were well drawn and consistent to there person.
Overall I gave this an 8/10 because it was a unique art-style with a good story with a great message.
There are parts that will challenge your youngest viewers, between the ages of 4-6 I might stay clear of, many because of the death component.
Also because of the setting, (fascist italy) you'll definitely want to be aware if your 10-15 year-old is watching it, they will have a different set of questions about fascism and youth.
Would I show this in a school setting as a recreational activity or as a field trip activity? No. I think this one is more a home movie, let each family watch it themselves and decide how to discuss the topics.
5-25-77 (2008)
Great, once
This was great self reflection. An incredibly self reflective movie. Kudos to it's writer, director, and subject, all being the same person. It reminded of my own dreams, some faded, some approaching. Love had, love lost. The story telling style was unique and...odd? But fun at the same time. I'll probably never watch this again, but I'll never watch shawshank or shindler's again.
The best friend might have been my favorite. One part pal, one part plot driver, one part angelic sage... If the character was real, I hope that PRJ found a way to rekindle that friendship. Great date night film for sure.
Thor: Love and Thunder (2022)
Fun for a moment
The beginning starts with almost slapstick level humor, like something you'd see in a parody movie, didn't care for that. But after watching it and discussing with friends. The funniest part of the entire 1st act was.
Kraglin - "We're married now, this is my wife."
Groot - "Pfft, I am groot"
They then dispense of the Guardians and move right into Jane Foster love story, except now she is Mighty Thor...lol...she even uses that name on herself....hahahaaha.
Korg then narrates at different points of the story as plot device to avoid needless story telling and just get to real stuff, you know, Thor being unable to deal with his emotions regarding Jane. YAWN!!!! If I yawned any harder the top part of my skull would detach from my jaw like I was Thanos style stormbreaker'd
Speaking of which. Did you know that thor has an odd relationship with his weapons and that stormbreaker is jealous of Mjölnir. So stupid.
The villain is super OP, but apparently his OP-ness is dealt with by the convenience of getting what he really wanted, the children...while he literally is winning against 2 thors, valkyrie and all of asgard...I'll just stop and kidnap kids so that I can get thor alone...to steal stormbreaker.
Congrats Disney, you have managed to take 1 franchise, (starwars) and one entire creative universe (marvel) and in the last 5 years convince me with your heart that I should look elsewhere for good stories, compelling characters, and overall entertaining experiences.
But i did laugh...so at least your better than Dr. Strange...but only slightly. You are still miles below Incredible Hulk(2008), and that's saying something.
Doctor Strange in the Multiverse of Madness (2022)
Third eye...blind
Worst movie in the MCU. Straight up. This felt more like a video game level with no story...or it was all routine superhero stuff to set up the next better thing.
America is a cool character.
Wong is great
But Dr. Strange was the one that was hard to buy. And that CGI eyeball...no one in that room felt like saying, "bro this looks like crap, can we figure out a better solution."
I don't need it to be an actual eye...do you? See, no one needs that youtube level special effects. Why don't you transition it into a hologram, or just have Strange Identify as a person with a third eye.
Scarlet Witch was pretty cool villian.
4/10, this movie now takes the bottom spot away from the first avenger and securely affirms...I suck.
The Batman (2022)
The director doesn't think you are smart enough
So I personally have distanced myself from DC, since dark night, they seem to be lost. But I finally broke down and watched because friends and peers said, "it's the best batman ever" COW DROPPINGS!!!
This was supposed to be detective batman, you know, the smartest guy in the room batman...
yet all he had was high-tech gadgets...alfred solved the cypher, alfred clue him in on Falcone, at least 5 times either batman or bruce wayne is just sitting there...waiting for someone to fill the silence with things he failed to consider.
And the reason they did this is because the dumbfounded batman/bruce is appealing to certain demographics...they mask it with his "hurt," "brooding," persona, but the reality is...the writer/director didn't lean into detective batman because if this character is smartest guy in the room, they just flat out don't think you, the viewer, can handle it.
Best character in the whole film is the Riddler. Like a proper smart-guy-pyscho that makes your skin crawl. And it's his puzzles that have people saying, "oh look, detective batman" Pssh. Detective Alfred.
All and all, its another DC flop. Even cat woman, who is supposed to be a seductress was used as more of plot device.
Moonfall (2022)
Did george lucas write the script?
So contrived and forced. None of the characters had any stakes, its like they were all adopted into the same family...yesterday.
The science was all wrong...every disastrous moment was solved with unbelievable scenes. Like gravity itself was keeping our main characters alive.
If you understand the premise, then you've seen the movie. Every scene snaps you back to reality with the inability to get you to suspend disbelief.
The Adam Project (2022)
Great time travel movie.
Our main character chases love across 3 different time periods, only to find out the whole thing was a set up job. So he teams up with himself, and his dead dad to undo what his dad had initiated in the first place.
As far as time travel movies go, it's no primer, but it's continuity is right up there with Bill and Ted's Excellent adventure. And the action sequences plus a young and old version of Adam Reed, (played by deadpool,) brings the most sarcastic and witty exchanges imaginable. The banter is fun. The time travel is spot on. And the ending is not the ending we want, its the ending we need right now.
Great job everyone!
Old Henry (2021)
Slow start, clever story
Our main character McCourty keeps a secret that is perceivable from the beginning of the movie. And when it's revealed it's greatly satisfying. The entire movie once the action starts seems to go from a trot to a full-fledge sprint.
I personally felt like the use of this secret was supremely well utilized. It made the right amount of splash at the right moment.
This movie also was able to capture a real western feel to it, which contrasts modern day westerns, which in my opinion are just love storys or dramas which just happen to be set in the mid-late 1800's.
Great job from the acting, the script, and direction of the movie. So happy I watched this.
Mulan (2020)
Kung Fu - good, Empowering woman - meh
I genuinely believe that outside of biology, men and women are people and people pretty much the same. Some people think cilantro taste like soap, some people put it on everything.
The old way of keeping women in women roles was hit upon greatly in act 1. But it didn't deliver. In act 2 it built up this sentiment by coupling it with the high goals of honesty and truth as means to honor your family, your clan, your country. In act 3 it just turned on a dime as though nothing from act 1 or 2 had any bearing. The powers that be just said, "welp, guess we will give you the keys to the kingdom then since you didn't want to stay in your place." WEAK SAUCE!
In the cartoon it built on this idea by sparing mulan's life because she saved the captains life, but that she was hence forth banished. It was only when she went against that banishment at risk to her own life, that she taught the captain that even a woman could do right thing.
So many things could have been done to enhance the message that women are equal...but if they wanted to just show that women are equally as powerful as men, then why play the gender card in acts 1 and 2. They could have just told a fictitious retooled version of mulan in which the army was already co-gendered. Done.
But this movie took this otherwise powerful message and just flopped it. If I show this to young ladies and girls in my life, the only lesson I can teach them from this is that it's fiction and if you really believe in something you have to fight for it. Not just have all the opposition bow and curtsy to your defiance and cultural taboo behaviors.
This is the only Disney Princess I liked because she felt real. This movie made her feel fake by making all the supporting cast treat her the way they did when she revealed who she really was.
But the kung fu was good.
The Outsider (2018)
too far fetched to be believable.
This movie is unbelievable from every aspect I know. Culturally unbelievable, cinematically unbelievable, story-line is unbelievable.
Every good movie lends to it's audience tokens of buy in, critically they call it the, "suspension of disbelief." Perfect movies keep tally near or close to zero, that is, for every instance they ask you to believe the story that is being told they trump up some reason for you to believe it. If the reason they give is too much of a stretch, your suspension of disbelief is broken.
Little buy in's and little rewards lend itself towards a huge buy in and a huge reward. This is why we but in to shawshank redemption and why we don't buy into sharknado.
In this movie, they just don't care. I am going to give you a list of buy in's that failed, and why I give this movie a 1/10
The movie is called the outsider, so you have to get me from white guy in japan to yakuza member. -1
A military man ends up in prison, no clue why, movie never tells -1
Prisoner saves yakuza members life while in prision -1
Yakuza member owes a debt of honor to white guy for saving his life +1
After getting out of jail, yakuza family employs strange white guy -1
White guy bludgeons another white guy to near death for yakuza family, without cause -1
White guy gets jumped into yakuza gang because he was willing to cut off 2 of his fingers. -1
White guy raises no reaction from yakuza member for banging his sister -1
White guy is allowed to live and work with yakuza while suspicion of a double agent exists - 1
When a yakuza family ensares the remains of a weaker yakuza family, all of the members are spared by the traitor except the head of the family -1
White guy is allowed to enact revenge on the traitor in the midst of the other family -1
All of these things are given without reason and without support from historical culture, known culture, or even make believe culture.
The action scenes are decent. Leto is true to his part. But the entire thing is so loosely connected I had to force myself to keep watching. Because despite this being a movie, even the movie forced itself to keep believing itself when there were clear reasons to end leto's journey 20 min's in....and they persisted till the end of the movie.
Cooties (2014)
i expected better
I was hoping that Rainn Wilson would bring some the surprise from the movie,"SUPER." maybe a little off putting at times, but despite a flawed hero, he ends up being heroic. I was hoping that Elijah Wood would bring some of that strange from, "Wilfred." The surreal effect of having a dog as a person. The concept was clever but it was totally underwhelming. There was no surprise and the flawed hero was crutched by a pseudo romance. It didn't have a surreal enough feel to it because the story was so localized. When they weren't at school or in the dark then they were in the school while it was dark. If you like zombie movies, give it a go, but don't get your hopes up. also might be a good watch for teachers and childcare workers. They'd get a kick out it...maybe.
Exodus: Gods and Kings (2014)
Cool Story Bro
If the ideas and concepts are of the fantastic, why change the minor details?
Moses talks to a burning bush (bible) Moses talks to a bratty child standing next to a burning bush (movie) Moses is told to take his sandals off because he is on holy ground (bible) Moses sinks into a mysterious desert blooming batch of quick sand (movie) Moses has a either a fear of public speaking or a lisp or stutter (bible) Moses is savvy! (movie) Moses appears before Pharaoh numerous times advising and beseeching a peaceable release. (bible) Moses is robin hood and uses graffiti to organize guerrilla warfare. (movie) Moses' staff is the instrument of God's power (bible) Moses cries at God for being a dick, the boy cries back like biz-natch...then magic (movie) Moses and the Israelite people cross the red sea on dry ground with water on each side (bible) the red sea was mildly dry, but then a magic wave the size of a mountain came and killed everyone but Moses and Ramses (movie)
If this was the only exposure to the exodus story a person ever had, the writer and director painted GOD as a spiteful, small minded, wounded child. When in fact much is revealed about GOD's mercy when after each time he sent a plague, he sent Moses to Pharaoh for the release of his people.
In this movie, the god they illustrate is a god of pettiness.
want to watch a better made yet still Hollywood version of Exodus: Prince of Egypt.
Avengers: Age of Ultron (2015)
underwhelming
So i think part of what makes a super hero movie great is the dichotomy between your hero(es) and your villain(s).
I felt like the threat of an Ultron being virtually any and everywhere would create an inescapable feeling. Instead Ultron was more like Link from Zelda. Other than his infinite re-spawn capability this villain didn't scare me.
Now Scarlet witch on the other hand singlehandedly kept the avengers at bay. Where is a bigger more exploitative use of her evil side...that may have made for a better bad guy than Ultron.
To summarize, I never felt like our heroes were in mortal danger. The most difficult thing the Avengers had to face is evacuating civilians. Which for the record took about 25% of the movie.
The Maze Runner (2014)
this movie is awful
1. Cliché dialog between characters, "we have 3 rules here, don't hurt other people, contribute, and we don't go in the maze!" "dont you get it, we are already dead!" "We cant just leave him!" "He not only saw the griever, he killed it." "This is your first new find in 3 years right?" "I'm going back in" "We found a way out" "You led them to us." "Get....them.....out!"
Under developed Characters
-Thomas cried over his friend chunk, he knew him for 3 days.
-Thomas and Teresa cant remember each other, but somehow had a kinship that surpassed even those loose relationships that Thomas had already made.
-Minho, started off with the cool, special forces vibe. He was built up as the bravest of them all...then digressed into super infant status at the first test of courage.
-Alby was the wise prudent one, but digressed into a fool by the halfway mark when he ran into the maze, breaking his own rules, but didn't have to because we find out later that the entirety of the maze had already been mapped.
Conclusion
-we have a video message from President Snow's (hunger games) wife, she says, "I am sure by now you all must be very confused...angry, frightened. I can only assure you that everything that's happened to you...everything we've done to you...it was all done for a reason."
WHAT!?!?! i am sorry, but this is horrible!
first 20 minutes, boring, next 40, C+ last 40-50 minutes, garbage.
The Amazing Spider-Man 2 (2014)
the last 20 minutes (spoilers)
So, the first 90 minutes were typical. I did continue to capture how angsty spidey seems in the comics. however...it was cliché after cliché...loosely connected plot point to loosely connected plot point.
that is until the last 20 minutes or so.
Harry shows up, figures out spidey is peter, steals Gwen away...peter catches up to save gwen, only he was (cliche) too late.
The cry scene by spiderman at the loss of gwen was really good, seriously moving. The subsequent drama surrounding spiderman giving up because of his guilt, the world going to crap, his Aunt verbally chastizes him for letting his self go...he mustards up the courage to try, re-enter spiderman!
Time and time again superhero movies are ruined by under appreciating the complexity of character.
Dear marvel....aka Disney, you wanna re-stoke the fires of superhero worship...give villains their own 1 hour movies to become villains. Let us know why they are the way they are so that the fight between our hero and our villain becomes a physical exchange of philosophies.
Then let the organic nature of life move superheroes and villains back and forth over the lines of what we view as good and just.
The Secret Life of Walter Mitty (2013)
likable, predictable
like a date all hopped up on schnapps, you know yer gonna get some, its just a matter of time.
As entertainment, i like it. It was a fun, energetic movie that kept you wondering if the adventure was real.
As a movie it lacked depth, believable characters, believable story, and under developed characters. you never felt like you were growing with Walt. In fact, I never felt like Walt grew as a character. He regressed back to his teenage self. And perhaps that is my disconnect.
the one moment that you were hoping for, Walt telling off his boss, never really hit home as one might expect. Instead it was the exact thing his boss needed to hear.
as a final moment of valor, it was WEAK! But the final shot, negative #25, very predictable, but satisfying. Now i would not have guess that picture, but its message, I was waiting for it from about the word silver bath.
Mouth to Mouth (2005)
Jim Jones Kool-Aid anyone?
This story unfolds when our main character, Bat, played by Ellen Page is invited to join a social movement called spark. They help young homeless kids find resources and try to educate them.
As the movement grows, so does the leader's desires. He eventually recruits these young burnouts into relocating to a vineyard somewhere in Spain. Bat is at first all in on the whole commune thing and is working diligently to prove her worth.
She is shunned by the leader, Harry, and in an attempt to gain favor with him, she has sex with him. (no nudity, sorry pervo's) This backfires as with most demigod figures in history has a real problem with libido. His performance on the night was lack luster. Bat tries to comfort him and he recoils and then turns in back on her in a communal meeting and she is ostracized by the group and punished.
The veil is lifted and now Bat is seeing and thinking clearly. She tries to convince her mom, who in an attempt to stop her was sucked in to commune, to leave and get away. She fails.
This movie is very good reminder of why communal living, whilst great in theory, is not so great in its application.
Morale of the story. DIY DO IT YOURSELF Think for yourself. When it looks wrong, feels wrong, sounds wrong....IT'S WRONG!!!!
Kick-Ass 2 (2013)
Cliché sequel, nothing to see here, move along
So other than the star, the one solid performance by Jim Carrey, there was nothing new to see.
sure Hitgirl tries to fit in at school and is reminded that she should just be herself. (cliché) Kicka$$ has a mid-life crisis at 17 and gets back into crime fighting. And his dilemma is whether its the right thing to do...(cliché)
Even the fight scenes have the same "oh know hit girl is gonna die" moments to them...and then she doesn't. Had the thrown that "LA-LA-LA... LA-LA-LA" music from the first movie during the demecco house fight scene even the moronic masses would have picked up on it.
In my opinion, this movie is a good example of why piracy is so rampant. 10$ ticket, 7popcorn, 1$drink (loyalty cup), 4$ candy...22$
22$ for 120 minutes of, "entertainment"
Matthew Vaughn > Jeff Wadlow
Elysium (2013)
Its a copycat
Have you ever seen Johnny Mnemonic? *****Johnny Mnemonic Spoilers Ahead***** Other than Matt Damon's back story they are virtually the same movie.
Healthcare is being denied to the masses. Our hero is brought in for one last job despite not having adequate supplies or resources. Both movies feature a storage device that resides in the brain. Both devices have the potential to kill you. Both heroes proceed despite the risk of death. Both movies have advanced bio-metrics to keep the baddies out. Both heroes seek help from a guy named Spider! Both heroes have the same character flaw of being selfish.
The main difference, the acting in Elysium is better. But SOOOO not an original story. Neill Blomkamp should be ashamed for crediting himself as the writer.
Cockneys vs Zombies (2012)
Not good enough
This movie was done on a seriously low B budget. The graphics are meh, But i don't watch Zed movies for graphics. But the graphics in this were so terrible, it took me out of the movie experience several times.
The gore was up, and perhaps this writer/director felt as tho current Zed movies didn't provide enough gore, so they tried to step it up. But the animated Gore was of the caliber that you would expect from a 12- noon Sunday show from a lower end network like UPN, or some other freelance network.
The funniest part about this whole movie was the elderly fellow who took the English rhyme and slang to the next level. It was hilarious hearing him justify his random use of words.
This movie tried to give a more brutal and guns blazing feel to shaun of the dead...but all they did was get an old dude to curse excessively while doing nothing to develop the story.
Its like this, Going about your business, Z-pocalypse, lose 2 side characters, rescue family, escape certain doom by sheer cussing.
Its an English flick, so i will give it another go, but i don't think even giving it a second chance is reasonable.
Save your time and your movie!
Django Unchained (2012)
Tarintino fan-boys drive bad movies
For nearly 90minutes this movie is an uneventful dry mundane story about some white guy who cares emphatically for colored folks because there are only 4 types of people in this whole film.
The enlightened white man The liberated black man The debased white man The inexplicably incapable slave man....who yes, all happen to be black. by the way, where are the Asian slaves?
Right up till the part where DiCaprio loses his shiz and starts a dialog on the medical reasons why black people make good slaves...this movie was dull. DULL DULL DULL.
The final 45 minutes could have been made into a youtube mini-series, netted 1/1000 of cash flow but at least been loyal to story telling.
So here is the first 90 minutes of the movie Lt. Aldo Raine, (now played by Christopher Waltz,) frees "Steamin" Willie Beaman, (This time played by Jamie Fox,) takes away the shackles of a football and gives him a rifle.
They go around killing white people, because we all know that from the beginning of time till Nelson Mandela was released only white people were wanted for crimes. ANNNNNNND, only enlightened white people could detect their deception. And wouldn't you know it, The enlightened white man again forces his concept of right and wrong on the liberated Black man...Played by Willie Beaman...played by Jamie Fox.
They spend the better part of 2hours just killing white folk...that way the story of Brunhilde could be told....in a 2hour and 40 movie instead of another format that would net less money.
Then they plot this elaborate scheme to rescue Willie Beaman's wife, Mia Wallace, played by Uma Thurman, played by Kerry Washington.
This is accomplished by letting Egor, played by Jules Winnfield, played by Samuel L. Jackson, use his super spider sense and cat like intuition to detect the nefarious plot of buying a slave become known...then shoot DiCaprio in chest, sacrificing Lt. Aldo Raine, then after some fancy talking from Willie Beaman, you kill everyone, blow up the house and ride off into Super South, Super White, Super Racist Sunset...with your wife clapping you on like Mia Wallace after a line of coke.
This movie was good, from about minute 130 till the end, the rest was a waste of time.
I bought the movie and will be gifting it by throwing the dvd out my front door.
World War Z (2013)
To go or not to go...
I am seeing that quite a few people have critiqued this movie in the negative, so i wanted to slow it down and ask some questions.
Do you like zombie movies? Do you like action movies? Do you like movies that make you jump?
Then go watch it. Its not a landmark movie, but its a good zombie movie.
Does it drive you buggy when the story line is progressed only by the characters' own stupidity? Does it drive you nuts to see your main character achieve the impossible, time and time again despite having no super human abilities? Do you need your zombies to be super gory?
then don't go to see this. I still thought it was a decent movie, despite its flaws