alecspade Reviews

Celebrity Poker Showdown (2003– )

Best celebrity game on TV

[13 November 2004]

I play semi-pro poker and I like this show. The celebrities, for the most part, are not good but that's to be expected. They bluff about 90% of the time because I'm sure it says something about that in the little manual Phil Gordon gives them before the show. Any regular poker player would win this tournament with relative ease.

I'd like to see some different formats, though, to make it a little more interesting. Maybe have Phil play in the game, but he only gets 5,000 TC. I'd also like them to try to have cast members from different shows on, like in Season 1 when they had the West Wing cast. Also they might want to find the celebrities that are actually good at poker to play against each other. My gut says the players that are good don't want to play against a bunch of poker morons for fear of losing on a river suckout and never hearing the end of it.

My vote for worst player is Dennis Rodman, edging out Adam Rodriguez (of CSI Miami) who went out on the very first hand with nothing but I can chalk that up to just not ever playing the game, and Coolio, who played in the first season and played like he needed to catch a plane. Rodman actually won his game, embarrassingly enough, and didn't ever seem like he had a clue nor gave a damn.

Don't watch it to learn anything (other than the absolute basics of the game), but it is mostly fun to watch.

Pavement (2002 TV Movie)

If you like this movie, you'll like anything

[13 November 2004]

**MINOR SPOILERS HEREIN**

I ran across this movie while looking for something to watch late night. This was the only thing on at the time that was even remotely interesting. Ugh I should have just gone to bed.

Robert Patrick stars as a wilderness tracker who assists a homicide detective (Lauren Holly) to find a serial killer who is bumping off doctors and nurses. Holly was a horrific choice for the female lead and was terrible in this role. Patrick was stiff throughout, thanks in large part to the writing of his character which really makes him a very unsympathetic lead.

Speaking of the writing, it's really awful, especially in the detective's case. Her lines are atrocious and her delivery was comical. Similarly, the killer was entirely bad. You shouldn't be laughing at the end, should you?

Also, the police force in this movie would be hands down the worst department in the world. The SWAT team several times gets lit up like a Christmas tree without coming even close to hitting the perpetrator while the perps can't miss. One scene in particular towards the end with the two cops at a suspect's house, they might be legally retarded.

The tracking used in the movie seems pretty ridiculous. Patrick's character can figure out which way someone went by their tracks, okay fine. But that's literally ALL he does, as he does it over and over again while people watch on with amazement. And where did police work go? I guess when you employ the dumbest cops on the planet in one department, you're not apt to figure things out on your own. The cops seem baffled with every crime despite apparently doing no actual investigating. I suppose they were hoping the killer would still be there when they got there, maybe he fell asleep on the couch or something.

I give this movie a 2/10.