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Reviews
The Consultant (2023)
I'm a consultant, and I'm not impressed
Third episode in. There is of course delight in seeing Christoph Waltz doing his thing (it's Cel. Landa reincarnated), but nothing goes deeper than a farcical pastiche. The power dynamics and the bureaucracy wars are the juice of every corporate thriller, both in real life and on the screen. We expect devilish vibes, but not a Marvel-esque 'Devil in town' story. Conspiracies, power games, mind games. We get a bit of that: self-interest is changing the characters, and that's great to watch. But so far, it's all built like a cartoon, not a smart dark comedy. I'll watch it, but it's not yet my favorite.
Shrinking (2023)
They should build an airport...
... because the jokes are just not landing.
I wanted to like this, but it's just so off the mark.
While the premise is interesting, the script runs rounds (anyone noticed he going from one room to another, not leading to any real narrative advancement?).
The grumpy Harrison Ford is convincing, but again, not funny. There's no teeth, there's no grit. It's all lukewarm at best.
Some of the dialogues are just absurd, like the ones with the office assistance about... water? Really, the writers had so little inspiration they dedicate an entire dialogue and numerous miserable attempts at jokes about water.
Last but not least, it used I right off the bat the most basic cliche joke about psychology - as if a real therapy session would be "so what does that make you feel?".
It's ok to joke about it in a comedy that is not supposed to touch the matter. But this is about a therapist and is set in the psych center, so you'd expect a bit more sophisticated take, a bit more refined humor on the subject.
Prey (2022)
Predator for teens
There are too many sentimental, teenage-flick elements scattered all around to make Prey a decent part of Predator.
From a dog licking the owner saying thank you, to dog in peril, to gross French general giving dirty looks, to the battle of "underdog trying to prove herself" - these are OK conflicts, but they are all depicted in such a cliché manner that it reads from a young adult graphic novel.
The action scenes are decent, but they can also get pretty muddled. To me it was like: wait, how did this trap/weapon/object got there? How does it even work?
And lastly, the lack of verisimilitude in showdowns can't be ignored.
The best thing was the muscle fight between the girl and a man of her tribe. That was original and pretty well done.
Resurrection (2022)
This is what abuse feels like
I'm sorry to break it to the haters, but this movie is smarter than you. This is actually how abuse feels like. And that makes it a brilliant film.
The character of David Moore is the abuser, but what is displayed on screen, time after time, is the abuse itself. The gaslighting, the kidnapping of something of value from you, the control, the threats, the crushing guilt. It's all too real.
I assume the haters hate the ending. This movie is so smart that it understand that in a movie not everything needs to happen like in the real world. She got her baby back. She got her life back. She got her spirit back. She got her self-worth back. And it was inside the belly of the beast, which she gutted in a knife fight. It makes more sense than the real world.
Try to understand the meaning before you worry about physics, biology and other real world laws. This movie is an arresting metaphorical tale of abuse. Take it like a nightmare. Because that's what abuse, in the real world, feels like.
The Black Phone (2021)
It's Silence of the Lambs, but for kids
I don't know what's up with movies these days, but rehashing this formula of retro horror is still effective to some extent. The Stranger Things deal is on: kids taking the roles of adults and saving the day, lots of synth and procedural works to beat the devil.
Now imagine if Silence of the Lambs had a motivational speech to encourage little Starling to get over her fears, and another telling the Senator's daughter not to put the lotion in the basket?
Once you imagine that you'll notice what's disappointing about this whole breed of movies like The Black Phone. They're just not serious movies. They're horror, but for kids to watch when their parents are sleeping.
Suspicion (2022)
Pulpy and plays wrong with the race card
Another crime thriller that feels pulply like an airpoirt paperback. To make things worse, the "inclusive cast" was actually cast to be shown getting their asses kicked and thrown in jail for most of the time and accused of crimes. The white people are arresting them, and impatiently trying to get back to safety.
Queen & Slim (2019)
Sorry, but racists won't stand a chance
This film starts from such a simple premise and escalates as the fable that America has perpetuated since slavery years. If you're white, like I am, please pay some respect to this story. It goes way beyond this film.
Doctor Sleep (2019)
Superhero movie in Shining theme park
If you have any interest in real cinema, you have watched the first one. If you haven't, do that. Only then, our of curiosity, you may watch this. It's as shallow as a Marvel movie and a sacrilege to the original, elegant and truly terrifying in its metaphor. This has no metaphors: while the first ghost lady, for example, was the temptation of a married man towards an affair, in here all ghost are just attractions in the theme park. It's also a vampire movie with people dressed like Johny Depp in the 90s - so brace yourself for a ride in a sea of silliness.
Only Mine (2019)
Cheesy and soapy, but not that bad!
The one-star reviews are a bit too harsh. This is one of those guilty thriller pleasures, very soapy and a bit cheesy, nearly-good type of film. It's entertaining and predictable, but that's what most viewers should be going for anyway. Not bad or amateur acting or directing; the actors here are actually promising.
Them (2021)
This is a masterpiece.
This is a masterpiece. Very few movies - let alone a series - are capable of epitomizing a slice of History like this one. It's not about historically accurate, but rather to capture the nightmare some of ours went through and turn it into a concise horror tale like this. Think of it as a dream, a Bible parable or a wicked fairy tale. That's how it should be consumed. Take the journey, prepare for the punch and try to feel the pain. Rarely an artwork's violence produces a pain that heals. This is one of them.
Servant: Cake (2021)
Co-writer Nina Braddock ruined this season.
This tale had atmosphere and ambience; it was classy, eerie and spooky at one time. Braddock entered as a co-writer and made it a half-baked theatre farce, where it's al confusion and chaos and one misunderstanding another. The script keeps pumping hysterical attacks and jokes that never fully land. The attempt to humor falls flat, relying mostly on failed punchlines and the f-word (the brother said it 10 times in his three scenes of one episode alone).
This had a good concept but this writer has ruined it.
Servant: Pizza (2021)
The humor is lame
The humor they are instilling in this episode is so cringeworthy. Characters' feel like trapped inside an episode of Friends. No talent for that kind of caricaturing. What happened to the writers?
The Empty Man (2020)
Good elements, but it's a mess
There is good production value, cinematography, interesting editing and decent acting.
The story exploration sounds a bit too familiar: just like in The Ring, it's a loner trying to uncover an inexplicable plot.
But they never decide what is the focal point: urban legend, mixed with cult, mixed with vessel for spirit, mixed with person creation, mixed with evil kid, mixed with haunted Teddy Bear, mixed with ragged entity apparition...
The movie takes itself too seriously and never decides which threat to pursue. Nothing is empty here, it's just a bag too full of tricks.
A Rainy Day in New York (2019)
Boring, elitist and sexist
It's white, rich, hetero, it plays with stereotypes of dumb girls, it compliments the alpha rich and clever male protagonist... it's bland in its storytelling and reeks, in its numerous XX century social cliches. It's a parade of old-timer elitism and sexism. Skip it.
Kidnapping Stella (2019)
Fun little thriller if you let go the implausibilities
I love procedural thrillers. This is a specially good one in it. It's German. So it's all clockwork. The tapes, the tools, the drilling.
The fault in it is the Deus Ex Machina. Some things just fall into place too easily. But if you can handle that, sit back and have fun with the kidnapping.
Crime Time (2017)
Exploitative and unoriginal
This series is like Nightcrawler, but from the perspective of a Brazilian cop. I lived in Rio for years, enough to know that's not how people speak, act or even commit crimes. To me, it's always a waste to have the chance to show the favela reality, and instead show this type of generic thriller. It's ludicrous to think that a suburban, family cop, would have a Homeboy poster in it's garage. Or that masked white bank robbers will fill the cop's day. These are imports that have nothing to do with Brazilian day to day violence. With so much to tell, why go for these Hollywood cliches?
The acting and dialogue is truncated, but for international audiences it may sound realistic. The plot is interesting, with the family and work problems intertwined. So while entertaining, it bears very little of the truth it sets out to portray.
Piercing (2018)
Senseless
It's half-way nostalgia style fetish, half-way sadomasochist play, and halfway thriller, where nothing works in full.
To be fair, the only fully developed thing is the lunacy the characters, which renders the movie pointless in a charicatural word where nothing needs to make any sense. No one to root for, nothing to expect but more lunacy. At some point all we hope is that he won't kill her, because that would mean we are left alone with the main character - a dorky, flavorless average Joe, wrapped in a velvet-coated mess.