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Rosaline (2022)
Can't really call it a retelling imo
The premise of this film is that Romeo dumps Rosaline for Juliet. The original play tells us that Rosaline didn't even love Romeo in the first place. He wanted her, but she rejected him and took a vow of chastity in stead. The writers have completely changed the story of the source material. A retelling is when a story is told either again or differently. But it should still be the same story (i.e. Same story told through the pov of a different character than the main one(s)). This is not the same story. They'd be better off calling it a reimagining. Give the characters different names and costumes and give the film a different title and completely different setting/circumstances and it would be the same film.
Didn't watch it on that basis alone. It makes no sense. Sounds like, at best, alternate universe fanfiction.
Death on the Nile (2022)
Not as much of a write-off as others make it out to be
From what I've seen of the other reviews, a lot of people strongly dislike (to put it nicely) this adaptation of the book. As it happens, a lot of the people who have posted negative reviews of this film have also read the book and/or seen the 1978 version. Luckily I have never experienced either of those, so I didn't mind this one at all as I had nothing to compare it to. I actually kind of liked it. It has its faults, but I do generally enjoy Branagh's work as both a director and actor.
I have to admit -- as beautiful as Gal Gadot is, I have never really cared for her acting (like really, I was glad when she was the first one killed off), and if I knew beforehand that she was in this (honestly I didn't know), I probably would have skipped over it. But the story is good enough for me to get past that, and my god if Emma Mackey doesn't look like a Margot Robbie doppelganger... The CGI could do with some better work and I would have preferred if they actually filmed on location, but to be honest I've seen worse VFX.
All in all, I enjoyed the (recreated) scenery of Egypt and the mystery (even though the killer was pretty predictable all throughout, but from what I've read, the killer(s) in this film are the same as in the book). I LOVED the 1930s era jazz music and Sophie Okonedo as Salome Otterbourne was a stand-out in my opinion. So all in all for me, I wasn't terribly disappointed.
Purple Hearts (2022)
How does this have a 6.8/10 score????
I can't begin to describe how stupid this film was. This was nothing more than military propaganda behind an enemies-to-lovers facade. Watch reviews of this movie on Youtube by Jane Mulcahy, Kennie J. D., or Audra At Home. Any of those would be able to articulate everything wrong with this movie better than I can...otherwise this review would be an essay...
Belfast (2021)
Memorable
Best movie I've watched this year. Saw it two days ago and I'm still thinking about it. The young actor Jude Hill does a great job as the lead. In this, his first film role, he holds his own easily. I got a good laugh out of his delivery in the church scene, particularly as the character gives his donation! All of the adult actors were great as well but Caitriona Balfe's performance in particular was wonderful. It's easy to see why people are talking about her possibly being nominated for an Oscar. Living in Canada, I was not really familiar with the Troubles before, but this film has motivated me to learn. I have always had an interest in the history of this part of the world (United Kingdom and Republic of Ireland) anyway. But this film struck a chord with me in terms of how it shows the effects of this tumultuous time on everyday people. The fact that it is shown through the eyes of a child was another reason why this film interested me so much and why I love it. I love "Jojo Rabbit" for the same reason -- these films take harrowing parts of history and show how children and families were impacted. That is the aspect of history that I am interested in the most. Definitely looking forward to seeing this again.
The Dead Files (2011)
Seems fake
I've been interested in paranormal shows for several years now. It first started with Ghost Adventures, which I am still a fan of. Say what you will about Zak Bagans, but I enjoy his stuff and appreciate his efforts to be as transparent as possible by debunking things that they capture that aren't actually paranormal.
At the same time that I stumbled across Ghost Adventures, I discovered this show which, during all these years that I've had an interest in the paranormal, always rubbed me the wrong way.
Amy, the psychic, claims to not know anything about a location she goes to, but there's no way to prove that. Everyone's got a smartphone equipped with wifi and data nowadays...How would she claim to not know anything about Alcatraz (it's only the most famous prison in America, if not the world)? Or the Lizzie Borden house (after she claimed previously to be obsessed with Lizzie Borden)? I've often wondered if some of the things she claims to see are legit. How do we know she's not making it up? How do we know that she and Steve are not in communication at all? We don't know everything. We just see what they include in the final edit. For all we know, they could be talking to each other and sharing their findings with each other beforehand to make it seem like they're on the same page in the end.
I just finished watching season 12 episode 5. They show a sketch of a clean-shaven man who she claims to have seen at the location next to a photo of a heavily mustached man who is related in some way to the case and remark that the resemblance between the two images is uncanny. No, it's not...How can you see what the mustached man looks like under all that facial hair? They say the foreheads look the same, but I still don't see any similarity even in that area of the face. The forehead of the man in the sketch is bigger than that of the mustached man in the photo.
Sidenote...why on God's green earth did she dye her hair that reddish blonde colour? It makes her look gaunt...
Steve, on the other hand, claims to be a retired police detective, but when you search him up, there may be a brief reference to him formerly being a homicide detective, but mainly it says his profession is "actor". So it leads me to question if he's not playing make believe himself.
All in all, this is one that if I can help it, I will gladly miss while I'm channel surfing.
Titanic II (2010)
I want my 90 minutes back
If I could give 0 stars for this, I would...What was this?????? Most of my issues with this film have already been repeated several times, including the godawful visual effects...You'd think a film made in 2010 would have better visual effects than one made in 1996, over a decade earlier...It's like they just borrowed whatever visual effects program was used for The Room or Sharknado. Also what was it about those waves that made everyone with headphones on take them off? It's not like they're glasses that you remove in order to get a better look. The headphones don't obstruct your vision, yet every single character who watched either the first tsunami or the second one or both hit, did this. Makes no sense.
They also plagiarized some scenes from the James Cameron film. Namely, the slow-motion running while the hallway rushes with water behind them, Hayden, our "Jack" of the story, telling the the guy who fell on top of Amy, our "Rose" of the story, to "get off her", "women and children only" (did they say that on the Costa Concordia??? Somehow I doubt that would be a protocol in the 21st century after decades of women's lib in the 20th century). We also have a character trapped in a room with a jammed door (because of course it is) and the Rose character who says "we can't leave him", just like Rose in the 1997 movie who says this about the little boy trapped in the flooding hallway. Just like Jack, this spurs Hayden on to try to save him to no avail. And then, just like in the 1997 film, it's the Jack character who dies, not the Rose character.
The circumstances around how he dies are weird by themself. There are two people and only one oxygen mouthpiece. Being the hero he perceives himself to be (he literally boards the ship with four women on his arms), he makes Amy use it while he devises a plan to drown and hope to be revived when help comes. We don't know how long this help will take to arrive and as predicted, he cannot be revived. Seriously, who was the medical advisor on this film???
The help comes (Amy's dad) and they get into an inflatable raft. If a tsunami was strong enough to knock over an entire ship, why would anyone think a raft is a good idea?? Should have just stayed on the chopper. Anyway, she does cpr on Hayden and, of course (because it plagiarizes from the first Titanic, and because this film is predictable as hell with shoddy logic), he cannot be revived. Amy is supposed to be a nurse though, that's why she was on the ship in the first place...and she doesn't even do the cpr right!!!!!!! When you give breaths, you're supposed to tilt the person's head upwards to open the airway and plug their nose so the air doesn't escape and can therefore go into the lungs. She just cups his face like she's kissing him instead. Oh, and she decided as a nurse that the best she could do, in a nurse's infirmary full of first aid supplies, to stop a wound from bleeding was tape a credit card over it. Like a stiff piece of plastic is going to absorb any blood... In the end credits, we can see that there was a set medic hired for this film, probably so that any injuries could be attended to. But you'd think if he's a medic, he'd be able to correct some of this (quite honestly) basic first aid stuff to make it look a little more believable...
Oy vey...
Spice Girls: Live in Istanbul (1997)
Nostalgic
I was about five or six when The Spice Girls were in their prime as a band. I had this film on VHS back then and would watch it all the time (I would alternate between this and Spice World...keep in mind I was a little kid). I can't even remember when we got rid of it, but I found it online years later and it was like I was reliving my childhood. It was the same as the last time I had seen it and all the songs and dance moves came rushing back. I've never had the chance to attend one of their concerts in person, so this was the next best thing and I freaking loved it anyway! Now that I'm watching it as an adult, I now realize that some of the dancing is a little cringey, and I've now realized what the lyrics to 2 Become 1 are actually about...keep in mind I was five when I was listening to them and then I went years without their music in my life, so I didn't realize it before. That's why I took a star off.
The Last Czars (2019)
Pretty good
Maybe an unpopular opinion in light of some of the other reviews here, but I actually liked the combination of drama/acting and documentary. It allowed me to understand the history better in simple terms, as well as see how some things that the historians described might have played out. As a history teacher myself, I believe history should be told like a story. I think they did a pretty good job of that.
And for anyone who wonders why the actor playing the czar has a tattoo and why it wasn't covered up for the role....Czar Nicholas actually did have a big dragon tattoo on his right forearm. That is historically accurate.