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chris-e-sayer
Reviews
The Tomorrow War (2021)
Loved it! Good entertaining sci-fi.
I've read a bunch of the lower rated reviews and I honestly don't know how you would please those people. I wish I could see what they rated above a 5 because those movies would probably make my head explode they would be so good. One person even rated it a 2 because a lot of the cast was black?? Pfffft.
This was a great sci-fi. The premise alone... borrowing people from the past to fight a war in the future is brilliant. I've watched it twice in one week. For me, I would put this on par with Battle LA. Which I love.
Breach (2020)
I love B movies!!!
I went into this movie expecting something... you know? Good? I mean it has Bruce in it.
I was soooo confused until I realized this, my friends, this is a B movie. Once you accept that, it's still terrible. 10/10 as a B movie. 0/10 as an actual good movie. Haha! This show is a disaster!!!!!
Yippy kayay mother B movies!
Artemis Fowl (2020)
Bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad... bad
Oooooh my. Where to begin? Way too fast, no character development, if you read the books it was difficult to follow, if you didn't read the books it was even more difficult. This movie is hereby placed just slightly better than A Wrinkle Before Time and Anaconda and has made the honor of being on my favorite worst movies that I'll never watch again. Congrats, you made it!
Atlantic Rim (2013)
Reviewers - why so serious? MST3K gold!
I can't believe how many reviews legit critique this movie. I just watched the MST3K version and it was amazing! I love bad movies and anyone who has seen at least a good movie knows from first glance this was going to be a "dumpster fire" from beginning to end as the robots put it.
To be fair, if I did in fact think that this was going to be even a 5/10, I would have been as disappointed as many of you ... but for real? Actually, I take my critiquing of the reviewers back. Keep buying and renting movies like this. You are enablers that help people like me find joy by watching such terrible movies. As long as you keep doing it... I will have plenty of content haha!!!
This movie is so cringy I give it a 7.5/10 for being bad, 10 being solely reserved for Manos Hands of Fate... of course.
Keep circulating the tapes!
The Dark Crystal: Age of Resistance (2019)
So good, even 9/10 Skeksis approve
My little brother would always make the Chamberlains noise ..."mmmMMMMmmmmm" and it would drive me crazy!!!! Now my daughter who is 8 makes that noise and it's absolutely adorable while making me shudder with the memory of my little bro haha.
It seems the this was made for all of us 80's kids who don't want another remake, but an addition that can fit right into an already great story! The original creeped me out but I loved it. Same goes for this one.
Rim of the World (2019)
Terrible, terrible, terrible
Seems like they tried to make this more on the serious side, but it failed miserably. It reminded me of Spy Kids, only with swearing. A family B movie with adult jokes and bad language? Yikes, this was bad.
Black Summer (2019)
Read my review - actually a good show.
What makes this a good show is what you DON'T know. A lot of shows offer full backgrounds on every character so that you understand their motives, or why they have an accent, or why they are timid or tough. So here is my list of things you don't get in this show that makes it brilliant.
1 You don't know reasons behind anyone's decisions. You get to know each character only by current actions. This includes those that could be perceived as bad characters or groups.
2 you Don't get filler dialogue. This is a crisis, people don't just turn off the panic switch and start talking about "one summer" this, or "I had a friend" that... that you get in so many shows.
3 you don't get all rational decisions like you would from someone sitting on their couch, overweight, drinking soda, watching a show that sees every direction the character doesn't, calling the shots. You get people making decisions on a dime and yes, even hair pulling decisions that perhaps you yourself might never actually make. But relax, just because you are a trained zompocolypse professional, doesn't mean everyone is.
4 you don't get a real good guy bad guy in this show.
5 you don't get to see really anything that isn't at least in view of one of the characters
6 you don't get to listen to emotionally manipulating music the entire time. You want that, go watch transformers and try to figure out why you feel so sad for a robot.
What you do get is time to formulate your own thoughts. This is a strategically slow paced show at times.
Is this show perfect? By all means no. Are there a lot of unanswered questions? Heck yes! But when in life do you have the full picture? THAT is what I like about this show. I could have done with less swearing, but filter is removed once chaos hits. We all know that.
Cakey! The Cake from Outer Space (2006)
The most epic journey of awesomeness
Seriously, this mini web series fills the cracks in my heart like melted peanut butter. Super funny. The story of a cake from outer space that befriends Duncan, a 13 year old boy with a rapid aging disorder.
The Innocents (2018)
Don't listen to low star reviews...
This is a drama, people! Dramas aren't action films. The show moves slowly and deliberately. If you don't have a taste for shows that allow you to think, then perhaps this isn't for you. I love fantasy and sci-if fast paced shows, it this fantasy drama is very good.
Love the sound track and music also. Give it a chance.
Extinction (2018)
Good plot, good sound, good graphics, good film
Yes, the kids cried, but what would your kids do in situations like that? You mean their world is torn apart in a matter of moments and they seem *human? Interesting.
In all, an entertaining movie that didn't do all the useless Hollywood sex and language. The movie still moved along without it. I enjoyed the movie.
A Wrinkle in Time (2018)
Listen to the masses on this one!
My first review of a movie... ever!! Let's get this out of the way, I love terrible movies. I watch b movies for fun and this one made me almost go insane the entire time. I went with my wife and daughter and knew absolutely nothing about it. Wife said time travel and Cap Kirk so I said sure. I about lost it when I saw giant Orpa. This movie made me feel like I was wandering in the dark... absolutely no direction. Where was I being taken? I still don't know what the heck just happened.
Best thing I got out of this was when I perused eBay during the movie for a hat I saw in the beach scene (don't worry, these were booth type seats that wouldn't let the dimmed light escape- I'm not that kind of movie goer ).