Eddie_weinbauer Reviews

Wonder Woman 1984 (2020)

My kids can write a story, better than this

[1/10 · 27 December 2020]

The first wonder women was brilliant. It had a streamlined story with a goal at the end. This one, seem like it's all over the place. I keep thinking someone took Whole bunch of comics, and tried to turn all of them into a script.

The acting is Ok. But just OK. Steve does a great job, when it comes to being a big kid around anything with wings. But that's also were it stops. Gal seem to just go through the motion as wonder women. For some reason they have focused a lot on her being a civilian, along with her civilian lifestyle & work. Which is what exactly? She work at a museum or something. But you never get to see her what she does, or know what her job is suppose to be. She mostly comes into work and everyone just falls in love with her. A side from the mall scene, which you've seen in the trailer.( And whoever heard about an antique dealer/shop, being located in a Mall. It doesn't make sense. Malls don't have antique dealers. ) I've seen better heist/ robbery scenes in Dirty Harry movies. And they were made back in the 70s She doesn't go into costume before, nearly 90 min into the film. Some of the CGI really need better work. Or more money, which ever comes first

The plot holes are so many, that you can't manage to let em slide and give the movie benefit of a doubt. The opening scene with the young Diana, at the competition on the island. Doesn't serve any purpose for to movie forward what so ever. I suspect it was only used, cause they were under contract for some of the same females they used in WW1 They could have focused a little bit more on the fish out of water act with Steve. It would have been a great comic relief. He adapted a bit too fast and well, to 1984. I mean, he just woke up with the knowledge of how to use a phone book. Not to mention there were only one Diana in the entire phone book? And how did Steve know how to fly a modern day jet plane, when he was last around Double Decker planes were still a thing? Also someone need to tell the writers, that making something invisible for the eye, doesn't mean it's invisible for radar.

And the bad guys,or should I say bad girl? Cheetah, may sound like a really cool name, when you naming a car But as a super villain it just sound lame. Cheetah's aren't strong. They're actually pretty week. They are short distance sprinters, and usually strangle their pray. They give all on the chase, and don't have any stamina left to defend their prey nor them self .If it comes to a fight over it. So turning the super villain, into a cross between a human and cheetah was just silly'& cartoonish. No to mention the actress mostly has two expressions "bored" or "angry" I mean aside form the whole dweeb thing she got going

Sharky's Machine (1981)

It's a friggin music video

[1/10 · 23 August 2020]

Why they describe this as the Atlanta Version of Dirty Harry,I'll never know. The pacing is off,the action scenes are too far apart. And whats in between, is so boring you'd fall asleep,if it wasn't for that annoying jazz music. Every scene there is loud jazz music in the background.

In one scene you have his captain mumbling for 3-4 minutes over and over again. About how the pimp they arrested, had 700 dollars in his valet. While he him self only have 3 dollars

And as far as Burt playing a tough cop,he fails miserably at it. He captain is constantly complaining. yelling for no reason,when he is not throwing hysterical fit.

Max Reload and the Nether Blasters (2020)

Someone read ready player 1

[1/10 · 22 August 2020]

And decided to make a quick movie. If you take the last star fighter,Pixels+ a few other.Than mash em all together.Add some over the top, retro 80s cheesiness,and you have this movie nailed down.

The sad part is.There's really no story. You don't care about any of the people in it. And Kevin Smith need to exclude him self form any move that don't involve Jay & silent BOB. He comes of just like what he is. And over the hill old guy who try to be cool on a teen level,but don't succeed.

The movie in it self is about some Old Atari/cartridge game, that has some mythical status among gamers, Than suddenly it get dropped off at the work place by some mystical dude who has some evil plan you don't understand,nor care about. Our main character try to uploaded it to internet. an trigger some sort of "magic" evil plan.

Several of the scenes has some cheesy bad graphic overlay for no apparent reason. Like PAPER BOY back in the Arcade game days,

In short stay away,

PS Kevin,if you reading this, and come with another complaint about how critics didn't understand the movie,and how you invested 2 years of your life into it....NOBODY CARES! It looks like you invested 2 min into it,and barley that

Legacy of Lies (2020)

Some of the worst fight choreography ever

[1/10 · 10 August 2020]

This movie is really bad. The script may have been good on paper,but on celluloid it's poorly executed. It start out with a shoot out, in a abandoned bus station. Were Scott manage to miss a bad guy standing 10ft away and totally unaware that Scott has him in his sight. Yet he misses. From than on,you know it's down hill I never have much expectations when it comes to Adkins. But this was below every low expectation I have. Several of the fight scenes you can see the actors trying way too hard, to make it look real.Without succeeding. Also he is suppose to so tough. Yet he get his ass kicked at every cross road.

And for being a former super agent,he is not very tactical.Nor good. People manage to sneak up on him,places were they would make so much noise you would hear them coming from a mile away. He also does every mistake in the book

The Old Guard (2020)

Quite boring and pointless

[1/10 · 11 July 2020]

Lets be abundantly clear. This movie is sold on charlize Theron,make no doubt a bout it. Why though I have no idea cause she really isn't all that.

The biggest problem I have with it,is the pace.It's to slow for being a good action movie. And you don't sympathize with any of he characters. They actually bore you to death. Another thing. They suppose to be hunting someone who is hunting them,but they're not really putting an effort into it. Yet he has no problem finding them. over an over.

Bad Therapy (2020)

Boring

[1/10 · 6 July 2020]

As every other Alicia Silverstone movie,this is boring. Has this women ever done something note worthy, outside Aerosmith music vids and Clueless??

In this instance it's probably not only her fault. She could be naked,and it couldn't saved the movie. The story is just boring and the actors and their everyday life ,just uninteresting. You simply don't care,bout any of them.

Perry Mason (2020–2023)

Stinks

[1/10 · 27 June 2020]

Keep in mind this is only based on the pilot. But this show stinks,.. The Actors are really bad. The acting and chemistry is even worse. And the storyline is just utterly horrible. Mason is suppose to be a really down on his luck private eye. But he lives on a farm that is clearly very expensive decorated,based on the interior. Not to mention he is suppose to be an old dog in the game. Yet he walks into confrontation he should've avoided,and comes out loosing.

In short just avoid this one.

DC Showcase: Sgt. Rock (2019)

Not even a half-hearted attempt to make it good

[1/10 · 22 May 2020]

They have possibly picked the worst and lamest,story of SGT Rock I remember reading the comics as a kid. Some of the stories were aquatically quite good. This one however was not. SGT Rock. Team up with the wolf man,a vampire and Frankenstein ..C'mon. dc give us something batter

Heirs of the Night (2019– )

Oh The horror

[2/10 · 5 January 2020]

I started watching this show,knowing nothing about it.As I progressed into the episodes,I could understand why.The acting is cringy bad,and often very overly dramatic. It reminds me of those children dramas from BBC,back in the 80s Like the Lion,The Witch and the closet etc. It all comes off more as a school play. As far as vampire genera goes, it's not good.This comes off worse than a "A vampire In Brooklyn"

The line delivery seem very forced and there by unnatural. Acting is sadly wooden and the script is horrible. I'm sure the actors doe the best they can,but there's no saving this,in my book

Rambo: Last Blood (2019)

Stallone will always be second best to Arnold

[1/10 · 30 November 2019]

And this movie just proves it Make no mistake about it, this movie is just a money grab for Stallone. The plot holes are endless,the acting is horrible(Even by stallone standard) The story line is simply dumb ,and has been done too death before,way better,with cheaper actors.

Rambo has suddenly gotten a step family of sorts, from where you are never told.(that would require decent writing) Most of the movie is dialogue meaningless talk.

When it comes to the action parts, you get a lot of blood an gore, but Rambo has to be the worst green beret in history. He waste ammo on enemies that would've been dead few sec later, or is all ready dead.It seem to be done simply for the gore effect,nothing more

Not to mention, he doesn't seem to know the first thing ,about ambush or guerrilla warfare. Which is odd since that is what green beret is all about. Small units of soldier, wrecking havoc behind enemy lines

Half Magic (2018)

Maybe I'm the wrong gender

[1/10 · 20 October 2019]

Here. But this movie,is as unfunny as it gets. Heather, is usually quite good when she is in front of the camera. Even in Licence to drive, were she was probably only hired to be eye candy. She manage to steal the light and shine.

But this..This comes of as a feminist propaganda parody. The dialogue is flat an boring, and doesn't do anything to drive the movie forward. The chemistry just isn't there. They act like stranger to each other,having and awkward conversation in an elevator. They meet at a seminar of sort, were the theme is: My vagina is powerful and smart. My boobs are fantastic. This is a mantra they all chant in union,while breathing correctly. I mean C'mon ladies, is this really what the empowerment is all about?

I have no doubt Heather has met her quota of sleazy producers. But making this garbage, just make em seem in their right ,when they deny you the opportunity to write a scripts and have it made.

The story is bout heather's character trying to get a movie made,while her movie star boyfriend. Keep shutting her ideas down,and walking all over her. Saying indirectly that women in film are just to be eye candy.

The jokes aren't funny. The storyline is boring, The line delivery is flat,And characters uninteresting.

Sadly with this movie heather only made it that much harder for people with really good script, to get any sort of movie deal.

SGT. Will Gardner (2019)

A Turd is still a turd

[1/10 · 10 August 2019]

Even if you give it A LOT! of fake positive reviews. The story her is something of a disjointed adventure, of a vet from one of our many latest wars. Who have PTSD and problem adapting in the civilized society. A side from that, it's pretty hard to tell what the movie is about. There are a lot of flashback to episodes of stuff that he experienced in war time. But it's hard to grasp the connection of it all ,cause it's so disjointed.

But lets be clear Rambo it ain't. As a matter of factthis movie make Rambo look Oscar worthy

Batman: Hush (2019 Video)

It is truly sad

[2/10 · 20 July 2019]

When he comic is waaay better than the movie. Especially when it comes to the art work.

I loved the comic when I first got a hold of it I couldn't believe my eyes. The Art work, was just simply superb. The movie though, leave a lot to be desired. The art work is blend at best. The line delivery is so dead, you feel the actors are bored. They need to put emotion into it,feel something. Instead they are just going through the motions.

Alita: Battle Angel (2019)

Very uneven paced

[3/10 · 29 June 2019]

Chris waltz is overrated as an actor and as a good guy. He barley worked as a bad guy in Tarzan. As a Good Samaritan doctor,and a bounty hunter, he is not very believable. But enough about him.

The CGI effects are pretty amazing. They have put a lot of work and money into them. I only wish they had put just as much work into the story and the pace of it.

The problem is the movie goes in spikes. It has a long straight dull than it goes up in a spike with an action sequence,than it goes down again into a long dull. For so go up again when your about to turn it off. Aside from the effects there really isn't that much to see

Mia and the White Lion (2018)

Watch it for the interaction wit a REAL lion

[4/10 · 4 May 2019]

The roles portrayed in the movie, is very stereotypical. Which make the movie something you'd expect on the lifetime channel. The girl does a good job carrying the movie,in the scenes with the lion. But you don't believe them to be a family.

story is: A dad brings home a white lion cub to his family on Christmas eve,than later when his daughter has grown attached to it and it starts to grow up. He goes: "don't get to attached to the animal,it is a wild animal".. If you don't want you daughter, whom you dragged against her will from London to Africa to grow attached to a lion cub. Than don't bring it home, like it some sort of a cute kitten. Also the wife is very 1950 ish, Always happy always expecting hubby to make the right choice.

Another thing that bothers me, and make the movie very campy,is that whenever her dad says something the daughter don't agree with, she just pout a bit. Than they are a happy family again. That would probably work back in civilization,whee you have friends etc. But when you live in the middle of nowhere Africa, and have no social activities to distract you, or cheer you up. I think there would be trouble in paradise. And OFC in best Disney style, the wife's very little independent. Personally, if it was me. I would feed the dad to the lions he keep. Cause he is not a likable guy.

The Camera work is sometimes very good, other times quite bad. I do miss more interaction between the girl and the lion,when they are on the run. There are very few long scenes of the two. And almost every scene with her and the lion, in the wild are cut short.By scenes of how the family back home at the ranch, are panicking and scrambling to find em. That should be a minor thing.A back burner. What should be the main focus was the girl and the lion on the run in the wild open landscape of Africa They also need better editing. Sometimes there are shot of the girls feet and part of the lions body,which means the camera has been too close in. Shots like that should end up on the cutting room floor. The movie isn't bad,but it's just ok. Too much Disney style with the whole happy family, and bad guys with 5 o clock shade

Bumblebee (I) (2018)

Not all that bad,for a while it is actually kind of OK

[5/10 · 6 April 2019]

The biggest problem I have with this movie,is that they can't seem to make up their mind.Are they gonna make a children movie or a teen movie . The balance keep switching,which makes the movie hard to follow. Bumblebee it self, spend most of the movie .mostly keep getting his ass kicked.

The two human leads, are doing an OK job. Way better than megan fox & co. The CGI is pretty good to. The story could've been way tighter,though. But I liked it. I wouldn't call it a keeper,but still enjoyable

Hanna (2019–2021)

Started out good,than went downhill midway

[3/10 · 5 April 2019]

Someone mentioned in here,that the series has had 4 different directors. Which sort of explains the downfall. I've seen the movie,it was passable as action but not great. But the series goes from being an on the run from the government, to a teen drama.

The two leads, ares suppose to have lived as survivalists in the forrest. With the dad being the one who has most experience with civilization,though the girls is suppose to adapt quickly,and she does..

But than midway it all turns stupid,her dead who is suppose to be an ex pro soldier,keep doing these stupid mistakes. And as any series these day,they cross path with the main protagonists several times. And OFC,than something always happens at the last minute. Just so they can't kill em,just yet.

Some of the action scenes are just dumb and laughable,and lack all the tactic that her dad is suppose to have been thought and passed on to her.

This could have been so good,but got ruined by going in two many direction

The Mule (2018)

Too long

[3/10 · 30 March 2019]

There is hardly enough story here for 90min. Which is why they show almost every run he makes. The acting is great on mostly all accounts. But there just ain't enough meat on the bone here to make a good story. I also find some of the actions of the cartel kind of strange. They sort of pull attention to them self It would've been great if it was a shorter movie

The Dirt (2019)

Needed more decadence & debauchery

[5/10 · 23 March 2019]

It's not completely true to the book,but scratches the surface. It manage to be entertaining but, sadly it moves too fast trough what was the peak of motleys career=The 80s. They should've have lingered way longer on the sunset strip scene, with all the bands struggling for record deal and their big break through. They also completely leave out the part were Nikki,steals a guitar. Guess they were afraid of future lawsuits. I really felt that should've been in there, along with Rock for peace,in Moscow. They could have showed some of the old footage from it at least. Which brings me to part of the problem They completely leave out Rock for Peace in Moscow, which was a huge deal both in history and music. They leave out that they got kicked of the tour with kiss,cause of their behavior. The fight between Vince & Axle There is just so much material left out, that it end up feeling like a lifetime/hallmark movie instead of the rock'n roll lifestyle movie it should've been. Mick Mars is made into a bitter old caricature, that sleeps with his arms across his chest in vampire style(each palm touches the other shoulder)

They way it is now, it comes off like a cross between Netflix and hallmark.

They also forget to age the band. They change their look a bit ,to symbolize they are older, that is all. Yet their record label guy,keep looking like a school boy, all through the movie.Even though several years gone by.

But it still manage to be entertaining enough, for the most part of the duration of the movie. The actors look the part, just good enough, that you'll let it slide that it's not the real crue. But I still feel they should've included a lot more stuff. It feels like a race to show em as the mellow people they are today,more than a movie about Crue's history & how they got there

Also it seemed to revolve a lot! around Sixx, an scarse little the rest of the band. Sure you get the obligatory thrashing hotel rooms, naked groupies,sex in the bathroom. Etc. but they have let out a lot that would make it better and more solid. Like Crue being the one who gave GNR their first concert tour,by letting em be the warm up band for them( I seem to recall from the book) They should've made it into a tv series instead. Case this feels way too rushed But I still give em 5 stars.

Triple Frontier (2019)

Good for the first 60-90 min

[4/10 · 16 March 2019]

Than it just got stupid.

If they had stuck to the heist part of the film it could've actually been good. But than you have the whole We'll fly over the Andes with a way overloaded chopper,part. From than on out it's just goes down hill.

I've seen some people complained on too little background on the players. That part really didn't bother me all that much. I didn't really need to know every little thing about their life up until now..

But i nearly lughed when one of them is telling recruits not to go into the private sector,rather stay and fight for the government/USA and how proud he had been going into battle, with the American flag on his shoulder That line really cracked me up. Cause everyone know the private sector pays way better for the risk you are taking,than Uncle Sam.

There are a few plot holes though. Like the bad guy having all his money plastered into the wall of his house. Which really don't make any sense.Cause if you receive that much money, your walls would have to be rebuild every time.And the room would become smaller,as the walls get thicker.

Another oen that puzzled me,and gave away that it was gonna go bad from the get go,was the line about making it look like, it was done by another gang/cartel. Since when did cartels or drug running gangs,take the time to subdue the guards,instead of just shooting them. *Doesn't make sense.

But the movie is great up until we come up on the whole escape part. Which seemed was suppose to be the highlight of the story,but really was just dragging it down. 'If you gonna cross the mountinas with that much load why not just try and find the lowest point and cross there.Why fly to the highest snow covered peaks, and try and cross over,when you know you are overloaded. And this was suppose to be an experienced pilot.

Lost Angels (1989)

Not really all that

[2/10 · 10 March 2019]

I dunno how the original script looked,but I suspect it was far from what got produced.

What we have her is a choppy movie, about bored rich kids who get into all kind of violent trouble, just cause they are bored.

The main guy is a kid who seem to be more of a background character,kind of guy. He is in a rich kid gang called DAB(you don't ever get told what the acronyms mean). But the problem is he really seem more like a mascot,than a real gang member. He si not all that edgy. nor all that provoking. More the silent nerdy type. Than you have the female lead. The always lovely Amy Locane. But she don't have much to work with here. She is hired cause she is pretty,. She is the gang leaders girlfriend. But he don't really seem to care all that much about her. Kind more like something that is nice to have around.,

After a gang fight gone bad,and a car driven into a swimming pool .They end up in some sort of juvenile mental institution,for troubled kids.

Which is were most of the film take place.

The problem is you don't really feel for these kids. When I watched Where the Day Takes You I had sympathy with them. But watching this movie you don't really feel anything,near sympathy for them.

I think the biggest problem is the movie can't decide if it gonna be a gang movie, a Troubled teen movie,or a poor rich kid with their absent parents drama. I feel the main protagonist would have been played better by someone else.

Invasion U.S.A. (1985)

A fun cheese fest from the 80s

[4/10 · 10 March 2019]

I haven't seen the movie it's a remake of.I just watched this, cause I remembered I loved these types of movies in the 80s. Back then they were a dime a dozen. It's not bad if you take it for what it is. It's also kind of big budget movie, I think for being Cannon movie. They used to produce cheap action movies,on a weekly basis. So considering all the stuff they put in this one,I'd say it seem like big budget movie,for them.

Basically it's a mix of different action movies. You have a little bit of Red Dawn in it. In terms of Russians/Cuba guerrilla forces invading/attacking America. You have a bit of commando = A Retired operative that's have to get back into the game,against his will.

The basic plot is some EX CIA operative long with some russians and Cubans have decided to attack America guerrilla style,cause he/they feel they don't value what they have. So they start attacking civilian targets all around US allegedly. Dressed as Cops ,National Guards, or just the everyday man in the streets.

The Agency Comes to Chuck for help. Chuck blows em off ,tells em they should have let him kill the leader, way back in the past when he had the chance.

Turns out the Bad Guy,has nightmares about Chuck(Doesn't every bad guy) So he decide to make it personal and go after chuck before anything else. So Eventually Chuck becomes involved again and the two finally slugs it out in the end.

The main villein,is excellent portraited by Richard Lynch. He does such a great job as a bad guy,and totally outshine Chuck. Chuck Does his usual one man army stuff,with one facial expression all the time. Some the scenes are over the top silly and overdone, to the part were you role your eyes. But if you grew up in the 80s you'd loved these type of things. And back than the big scare, was the Russians. I think someone should make this movie into a video game.it would've been excellent with today's graphics and possibility's.

Rooftops (1989)

The hero is dumb as door knobs

[1/10 · 9 March 2019]

And the bad guys are comical at best.

And the girl who is stuck in between the two, just wish everyone could get along,and her poor poor dad to get healthy again.

The so called fight, dancing is just unintended comical. The dialogue cartoonish and naive.Even when faced with serious threats

I wish I could tell you about a the story line,but there really is none. The Hero, who people mostly refer to as T, lives on a rooftop as an orphan and loves his tomato plants. at night he participate in something they call dancing or combat dancing.Were they shadow box at each other until one of them fall of a stage,and have lost.

I have the impression every male in the movie, is an orphan of sort, and every girl ,is from a broken or struggling home. The biggest threat they face is a slick drug dealer and his 3 goons. Which no one seem to have the balls,to just take em out.

So in best 80s style, the good guy will have to run from the dealer until he is finally forced to take the a stand.(which is what he should have done in the first place.Which would have saved him a lot of grief)

The Quake (2018)

Great CGI

[2/10 · 24 February 2019]

Boring movie.

The movie spend too much time building up to the big quake, and when it finally happens, the expert goes ahead and take all the wrong decision you can take out of a text book, for what not to do.

The problem with the drama scenes, is mostly that the dialogue and chemistry is so wrong you don't believe a word of it.

Not to mention the father of year. who act more like the nutty professor, you've seen in every American movie since the china syndrome or before. He is suppose to interact with his ex wife, but the chemistry scream total stranger(even though they have acted onscreen together before)

Birth of the Dragon (2016)

As fiction,it's not bad

[3/10 · 10 February 2019]

It's mildly entertaining, but not very accurate. I like how the camera pans out when there is a fight scenes. That is something you early see in movies of today. Usually it's so up close that all you see is arms and legs.

The fight between Bruce and the shaolin-whatever, isn't half bad. They have made it look like an elegant dance.but the choreography could've been better and tighter. Several scenes you can see the actors standing,waiting for the hit. For me that is a great sin,when it comes to fight choreography.

As far as looking like bruce ,the kid ain't worse or better than Jason scott lee. Less pumped up,nothing more. Bit aside from the name,it has little to do with the real bruce lee.

For a once over movie,it's ok.