geekygirl-11825 Reviews

Chip 'n Dale: Rescue Rangers (2022)

Boring, Bad Characters, Did Not Finish

[2/10 · 29 May 2022]

Maybe it's unfair of me to review a movie I didn't finish watching, but I just see it as a marker of its poor quality. To sum it up, this movie was boring, the characters were unlikable, most of the acting was flat, and it was way too slowly paced.

I feel like I need to make a special note about how much I hated Dale. He was selfish and an obnoxious jerk and I spent what time I did watch the movie really wanting someone to punch him. (Alas, if there was punching, I was unable to get to it.) He only thinks of himself and his own fame and reliving the glory days the WHOLE TIME. There doesn't seem to be a single moment he thinks about something other than himself and his own fame and it just ticks me off. The voice acting was pretty lifeless, which didn't do any favors towards making me like this character.

Chip was slightly better, at least at first because he is just so done with everything happening. The deadpan seems more intentional and funny. But then the deadpan performance continues in supposed to be serious emotional events (a fake out death scene that I won't go into further detail about) which makes him also just uncharismatic. Never quite as hateable as Dale but a far cry from likeable.

So the two leads are already uninspiring to me. And then it's just made worse by the weird pacing choices. I won't go into details, but the two find the villain and reveal the plot halfway through the movie.

Coupling with this, it felt like a really long movie in general. After the reveal of the villain I said "well that was boring but at least it's pretty much over now" only to look at the runtime and realize I WAS ONLY HALFWAY THROUGH. With the mystery solved already and NO investment in the leads with half the movie still to go, that's when I decided to call it quits.

Christmas Vacation (1989)

Boring and Pointless

[3/10 · 28 November 2020]

Yeeeaaahhh, I super don't get ANY of these 10s. This movie isn't funny and nothing happens. What's there that's SUPPOSED to be funny is flat, senseless, predictable, or uncomfortable to watch.

The main character is a jerk to his brother and letches over women. I don't care about him or anything he does.

I don't have much to say about this, I checked out for the most part after about 30 minutes. Definitely not worth anyone's time and DEFINITELY not worthy of a SINGLE 10.

Rise of the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (2018–2020)

A Unique Take that More Than Stands On Its Own

[8/10 · 24 September 2020]

Rise of the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles is certainly unique, even in a decades old franchise about mutant ninja turtles. However, it handles these changes and challenges with enthusiasm, fun, and heart. The character writing, plot progression, continuity, and dialogue are all high tier, and the show can be both laugh out loud hilarious and tear-jerkingly heartfelt.

For me what shines the most are the characters. Raph, Leo, Donnie, and Mikey keep their core characteristics, but with new takes that invites character progression and audience investment to see how these slightly new personalities shine. Raph is still strong, passionate, and protective, Mikey is still the baby and heart of the family, Leo is still a dorky planner, and Donnie is still the brains. But by making Raph the leader, he loses his typical anger issues which really allows his TRUE character to shine. And doing this also allows Leo to REALLY develop as leader, but not be preoccupied with being 'Mr Perfect"-- allowing him be the dork he always has been deep down but has never gotten to be a part of his personality that got a lot of spotlight. Mikey and Donnie are mostly similar, though Donnie is slightly more mad scientist.

Rise also features the BEST April (sorry 2k3 April, I still love ya). Other Aprils are ... fine, but they usually aren't all that interesting and have pretty mild personalities. But Rise!April has a very definite and strong personality, and you can say without a doubt what she thinks about things and how she would react to a situation. She also has relatable and well-portrayed doubts and setbacks with her self-esteem, which are present but not driven to a painful highschool cliche.

And rounding out the main cast, is probably the most controversial part of Rise: Master Splinter. Yes, at first this Splinter is a neglectful slob and kinda an a**hole. You will probably hate him at first. But then Rise does this funny thing called "character progression", and as you learn about Splinter's backstory you start to understand and sympathize with him. He also improves how he acts throughout the series, and by the S2 finale he's as likable as any other Splinter.

Another thing different about this series is its more family-oriented, slice-of-life style of story progression. While I can definitely see how that can turn some people away, the slice-of-life adventure episodes are as well handled here as they can be. The writing style of this series is equitable to the 2017 Ducktales series. The turtles and their family/friends have an actiony 20 or 10 min stand-alone adventure, but character progression is always happening and oftentimes that adventure can also tie into a larger story.

The dialogue in the show is natural and excellently voice-acted. The brothers and April act like real teenagers and real family, and even though there is an inclusion of often frowned-upon and controversial modern humor, it's implemented naturally to the characters. It's not forced for the sake of "how do you do fellow kids", it's in the show because that's how a modern teenager would react, and these turtles are very much modern teenagers.

The focus on mystic powers yokai is interesting, and definitely a cool new concept. Not too much to say on this front. The boys' powers make for exciting and creative fight scenes that are fun to watch, but I'm not a big action scene person so I can't say more than that, really.

I will say that it loses a few stars because there are admittedly some really bum episodes in Season 1 while the show was still getting its footing that are more annoying than the rest of the show, and that for as amazing and refreshing a concept as the yokai are, they aren't as well-explored as I would like. A bit more time spent in the yokai Hidden City, especially in S1 would have been appreciated.

Overall, Rise of the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles is different, but it handles itself excellently. Jaw-dropping animation, strong character writing, on-point dialogue, genuinely funny humor, and a strong and heartwarming central theme of family; this series more than deserves a respected spot in the TMNT franchise. If you like strong character and family-centric shows (and I would say if you enjoy the 2017 Ducktales) and/or just want a fun action cartoon, check out ROTTMNT. You'll only be disappointed if you expect for yourself to be disappointed.

Ralph Breaks the Internet (2018)

Ralph Breaks the Internet: Decent Movie, but a Poor Sequel

[1/10 · 23 November 2018]

There are two ways to look at Ralph Breaks the Internet (or Wreck-it Ralph 2, as many will inevitably call it), and that is as its own film, and as a sequel. As a film on its own, this would be a fairly good movie. Fun worlds, a solid main cast, and a good lesson on friendships, though a bit ham-fisted at times. However, as a sequel this movie does badly, not only not being a good follow u, but straight up breaking the first movie's logic and characterizations entirely, in ways including but not limited to: Vanellope can leave her game: A smallish issue that represents a larger problem. If Vanellope still glitches, why can she now leave her game? The first movie clearly establishes (as a major plot point, no less) that because she is a glitch Vanellope cannot leave Sugar Rush. Yet in this movie, this is apparently no longer an issue. Breaking World Rules--Don't mess with the Player: The whole catalyst for this movie is that Sugar Rush breaks when Vanellope resists the commands of a player. While the player wants to turn one way, Vanellope keeps fighting against them to turn another. In WIR, this kind of action is shown as a major no-no, but this movie doesn't criticize Vanellope for these actions at all, instead wanting viewers to be sympathetic towards her for this. Out of Character Vanellope: Remember all of the hard work and struggling that went into making Vanellope a real racer in the original? Remember how complete and happy the ending was when she actually achiever her goal? Well the sequel doesn't. After only 6 years of living her dream, V is "bored" of Sugar Rush. Yeah, all of that hard work and suffering, and she's tired of it after only 6 years. Plus, her relationship with Ralph portrays her as a jerk, but more on that later. Not to mention that she shows no awareness or regret that she made everyone in Sugar Rush homeless with her selfish actions. World Rule Breaking--Going Turbo is ok now, I Guess?: The worst part is the resolution. The entire point of Wreck-it Ralph is that going Turbo is bad. Everyone tells Ralph not to do it, and it's said over and over that it;s a terrible thing to do. The worst, even. But for some reason, in THIS movie, it;s ok for Vanellope to go Turbo, and abandon her game for her game for Slaughter Race, even encouraged and praised by the movie! It makes the whole lesson about "friends can have different dreams" sour, as it implies that it's a good thing for you to allow your friends to do immoral actions. This also makes Vanellope's character in this movie even worse, as she essentially ditches Ralph in order to commit a crime to fulfill her own selfish desires, and even worse the movie puts her in the moral right for this! That's a terrible lesson, given the context of the original, akin to "if your friends wants to be a drug dealer or criminal you need to let them to be a good friend". Dropping other Characters: Hope that Ralph and Vanellope were the only characters you liked in WIR, because they're all you get. Virtually NO Calhoun, Felix, Sugar Rush racers, any video game characters, or pretty much anyone. It's the Ralph and Vanellope show. And while they're good characters, not including anyone else is a bad idea for a sequel movie. So that's the general review for the movie as a sequel. A its own movie, if you had never seen the original, this makes for a bit better of a movie. Without the context behind going Turbo, this actually has a pretty good moral about friendship, and how friends can do different things but still be friends. The internet world is fun and colorful, and Ralph's character arc of dealing with insecurities is touching. Of course, it also has it's minor faults even beyond sequel ones, ones like: Too much Meta humor: From an entirely subjective stand point, I'm just tired of Disney using so much meta humor. This is like the 4th or 5th film they've done this in, and it's getting old and unfunny. Hamfisted dialogue and slow pacing: "show don't tell" is something that this movie struggles with. A moment will be emotionally impactful. or even profound, but then a character SAYS what the feeling of the scene is, or tells the audience why this scene is important. It's annoying, and demeans the audience. Also sometimes this movie can drag and feel padded, especially around the end.

Overall, if you've never seen the original, or at least don't super like it, then this is a fairly good movie. However, if you're looking for a good Wreck-it Ralph sequel that continues the world and character building of the original, you'll be left with a lot of confusion, plot holes, sour morals, and lackluster world building.

Star Wars: Episode VII - The Force Awakens (2015)

Ugh...Hard to Believe that my 6 is being Generous

[6/10 · 30 December 2015]

Wow. My 6 is actually looking really generous. That's really only because I'm too nice a person to give movies 4's or below. I save those for movies that I think are truly unwatchable. Unlike the majority of these reviews which rarely breach 5 stars (which raises the incredibly suspicious question of how in the world this movie currently has an 8.8. I smell something fishy.) Anyway, my overall impression of this movie is that it's really...really, fanfic-y. My brother (who was one of the seemingly rare souls who actually liked this movie) yelled at me all the car ride home from the theater (about half and hour), for this opinion, but this movie was just really fanfic-y.

My main reason for this is in Kylo Ren (or Ben Solo, or whatever), the incredibly annoying and underwhelming villain of this movie. The second that they revealed him as Han and Leia's son with no build up or suspense whatsoever was when this really descended into fanfiction territory for me. Having the child of two pre-established characters seemingly randomly become the villain of a sequel just because "drama" (without playing any of the drama that could have been there)is just nauseating. That's how Kylo started to make me feel every time he was on screen. Nauseous. And that is a serious problem.

Maybe if he had had a good character I could have forgiven and tolerated this fanfiction-y nonsense...but he didn't. When you make a character, even a villain, there's got to be something to like about said character. Whether it's a mysterious and intimidating presence, charisma, pure baddassery, doesn't matter,there needs to be SOMETHING. This villain has nothing. He's whiny, annoying, what I already said about his "backstory", and throws a temper tantrum WITH EQUIMPMENT when he doesn't get his way. Any other sith lord or really any villain would have taken out their frustrations on their underlings. Wrecking equipment just makes you look childish and stupid.

All of the underwhemingness of this character boiled down to the ending scenes of the death of Han (something I can't say touched me emotionally, just because it was so forced and obvious), and the final "lightsaber fight". I use quotes there because this wasn't so much a well-choreographed sword fight, more of two-sorry three- inexperienced children whacking each other with toy swords. Kind of justifies all the fear of the lightsaber design. It reflects everything that was wrong with the fight. Instead of a graceful and refined weapon based of the katana of samurai, it's a claymore used for fighting with strength alone.

OK, that leads into the second reason that this is fanfic-y. The girl. I forget her name, which is NEVER a good sign about a character. I hate to say this about characters, but it did drift into my thoughts that she is a Mary Sue. Meaning, for you that aren't a part of the fandom world, an overpowered main character who has no apparent flaws, has no real reason to be a part of the story, and has some love story just for good measure. Usually a relationship that has little to no real chemistry.She learns how to Jedi mind trick people and fight a supposedly-trained-by-Luke sith in the course of one movie. I honestly can't recall if she was even told what it was a Jedi could do, or even what the force was (from someone more credible than Han, I mean). Another staple of the movies, the Jedi, and that is screwed up as well.

Apparently everything about the Jedi want to be ruined in this movie, because the third biggest fanfiction-y thing in this was what was done with the Force. No longer the center of a religion, that reflects the good and evil in the world, it's really just more of a cool weapon that's thrown around whenever that would be "cool". Ren uses it for mind reading, and torture, and holding laser beams in one place. And lightsabers can call to people and give them intense flashbacks, now, apparently. Basically for a lot of things that no one ever said that the Force could do. There's no Force choking, very little moving objects with the Force, and the one usage of Jedi mind tricks is gag-worthy. Honestly, based on what the Force does and how people use it, I don't think Finn was too far off in thinking that it could find a way to destroy the Star Killer.

Personally, I was fine with Finn and the Supreme Leader (I kind of wished that he was the main villain instead of Ren. At least then there wouldn't be this shoe-horned in drama), and I do find it more watchable than the first two prequels, at least. But the huge issues with shallow (and slightly nonsensical, are you telling me that after all of that work to defeat the Empire, NOTHING HAS CHANGED? Plus Luke and Han running away from their failures and responsibilities?) plot, and fanfiction-y treatment of characters, this isn't a good movie. It also doesn't seem to respect any previous lore or world-building (they blew up Corascant without much of a word. An entire pre established planet system just gone and no one seemed to care. Plus, Nakku, or whatever, was a carbon copy of Tatooine, just minus a sun. Disappointing…), especially considering the Jedi, so I can't say that it does too well as a Star Wars movie, either. Eh, worth watching on DVD, maybe, but I wouldn't suggest seeing it in theaters. (Made the mistake of going to see it in very-pricey Omnimax. And there weren't even that many space battles, the one thing that might have made the price worth it…)

X-Men: The Last Stand (2006)

I Don't Understand the Hate!!

[7/10 · 25 December 2015]

I'm sorry, I hate to be "that guy", but I cannot understand the hate for this movie. Still don't want to be that guy, but, quite frankly, this is my favorite Xmen movie in general. I've watched it with absolutely no knowledge of Xmen and liked it, then watched it after watching every single animated incarnation of Xmen (not kidding) and actually liked it even more. So this is less a review for the movie, and more a tirade about how I don't understand the hate. Sound cool to everyone? If not, just keep scrolling, and don't mind me. Just another review in a sea of text.

First of all, people complain about this plot ruining pre-established ones, and "wah, why didn't Bryan Singer direct this? It would have been so much better". At least this one USED an actual Xmen plot line, unlike the other movies (err..excluding DoFP, but, that one hardly follows the original plot that I've seen). X1 and 2 had some completely random and out of nowhere BS, and X2 is only watchable because Nightcrawler is in it. Otherwise it's boring and random. But X3 uses both the Phoenix plot line and an interesting cure plot line.

Are people mad because Cyclops dies? Because, if you ask me, and I've said it many times, I think that was a mercy killing. Singer had made Cyclops into an unlikable, flat, whiny, character, that had absolutely nothing likable about him. Personally, I prefer to see him dead than treated like that. He's supposed to be a leader, not a whiny, overly-jealous, well...

As for Prof X's death..meh. If you'd stay till the end you'd know that he doesn't die.(By the way, Moira is in this scene, and she's ACTUALLY Scottish LIKE SHE'S SUPPOSED TO BE. Sorry, those are issues for another review *glances at First Class*) Okay, peoples' issues with the various mutants cured...

1) First of all, it's strongly hinted that the cure IS NOT PERMANENT. So that takes care of that.

2) Yes, I do think it's in-character for Magneto to abandon Mystique once she is turned human. In case you didn't know the premise of the character, he sorta hates humans.

3) It is also in-character for Rogue to want the cure. Heck, 80's Rogue almost got one from Apocalypse in the animated series, and if I remember right Rogue is pretty torn about it during Wolverine and the Xmen.

Okay, is it the lack of Angel? This is the one I see having the most ground but at least he's there, and at least he hasn't had his entire character/backstory butchered like Rogue and slightly Nightcrawler and Cyclops and...was that supposed to be a X-23 Lady Deathstrike hybrid in X2? Okay, so he's not an Xman, there are a lot of them left out, some more important than he is.

Also, this movie has the best Beast. Everything about Beast in this movie from his introduction on is spot on.

Look, I could go on and on, but I've already had this conversation with so many people, and I'm tired of having to defend my minority opinion all of the time. Just, go rewatch X2, REALLY re-watch it, and then tell me that X3 has a horrible plot and treats characters badly and has bad dialogue and what have you. I'm done. I've had my little rant, I'm done.

The Last Airbender (2010)

Burn It With Fire!

[1/10 · 25 December 2015]

Do I really need to say anything at all? (Answer: no, but I couldn't resist the temptation to write a review for this God-awful movie, and I never use the term "God-awful" lightly).

This movie is an abomination that should never have been made. You know it, I know it, pretty much anyone you'll ask will know it.

It has no respect for the source material, good writing, good effects, or really good film making in general.

It's bending sucked majorly and none of the characters were treated correctly. They pronounced the main characters' names- the main characters of an incredibly popular TV series enjoyed by people of all ages everywhere- wrong. And Sokka....poor, poor Sokka. What did they do to you? T-T Sorry. Got a little emotional there.

I'm literally just saying what everyone already knows, but it's kind of fun to rant about stuff like this, especially when the world agrees with you. Not that that makes me happy that this movie exists. Because this movie really shouldn't exist. Don't watch it. Don't buy it- unless you plan on buying it for the sole purpose of destroying it, in which case I suggest using all four elements to do so. Smash it with a rock, throw it in a lake, tie it to a balloon and send it into space, or - my personal favorite option (yay Fire Benders!) -burn it with fire!

Paddington (2014)

So awesome!....until the plot decided to show up

[7/10 · 25 December 2015]

(*note* By "spoilers", I mostly mean basic plot details, and one little anti-climatic reveal that...frankly isn't that much of a spoiler. But more on that later. Just figured better to be safe than to be sorry)

If this whole movie had been like the first 30 minutes or so, then this movie definitely would've been a 10, it was adorable and sweet and entertaining. But then the plot (as in, the stuff added outside of just the heartwarming story of Paddington trying to find a home)reared its ugly head. Just...why? Why did they feel the need to add a villain to the story? Everything was perfect the way it was.

How can I explain?

It's just, they made this super stereotypical and bland villain. She kills and stuffs endangered animals because, she's evil, guys! And they give her that platinum blond sharp villain hair, where you just see it and it's like, oh, look, a villain! Not to mention the not-at-all-surprising surprise reveal that *gasp* she's the daughter of the explorer guy that Paddington is looking for! Did I mention the gag-worthy bits about how the Browns' neighbor is constantly trying to hit on this villain girl who looks at least a decade younger then him? What was the point of that character, again? Sorry, I sound really mean and sarcastic right now, but that just because I'm so frustrated that this lousy and bland villain "plot" acted more like obnoxious filler that dragged the whole movie down.

But, enough about that, let's talk about the actual good movie, the one about finding a home, and how being family is more than just being related.

First of all, let me get it out of the way, the animation of Paddington (and his Aunt and Uncle) is really good. He's soooo adorable, and doesn't look awkward in scenes hardly at all. So, there's no need for you to worry about this being a *shudder* Alvin and the Chipmunks or Smurfs type deal.

Personally, I've never read any of these books (and I'm thinking about changing that after this movie, yeah, I'm an adult who wants to read a children's' book series, so what?), but for Paddington as he is in the movie, he's just adorable. I think the best way I can think to put it is he's just a little gentleman. He always tries to have good manners, and he tries so hard to do things right, and be a good guest of the Browns. Also he's adorable.

I love the scenes of him questing for a home, from the moment the Browns find him just waiting in the train station, to every scene afterwords of bonding with the different family members. I will have this to say about the plot I've hated on so much, the part where the Browns stand up for him and say that he's family is touching. It's a good moment for the whole family.

Basically, to sum up this movie, pretty much every scene that has Paddington in it is gold. Scenes that don't are iffy at best. This movie was so close to greatness, if it would've just kept its focus in the right place, and that's in the heartwarming quest for a home; instead of having a half-baked boring villain plot show up and highjack the movie.