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Spaghettiman (2016)
Second Best Superhero Movie of 2016!
I enjoy watching low budget films mainly because they can be more entertaining than big production films.
I truly enjoyed watching this movie. This was absolutely hilarious, very original. The actors took their role seriously and just ran with it, each really delivered a serious performance despite the corniness which probably made it even funnier. It was obvious that this movie was really thought out and the script was really well written and directed.
I feel that lately a lot of comedies are not well written. Perhaps the writers think that just because their movie is low budget, or because it's a comedy, they don't need to care about quality; so long as 100 fart jokes are thrown in, then it's comedy! Wrong! That's cheap comedy.
Yet that's not the case with Spaghettiman. It had so many wonderful elements, plot twists, witty dialogue, it's worth watching again. As a matter of fact, I would actually be willing to see a sequel made.
Bubba the Redneck Werewolf (2014)
Teen Wolf Infused with The Beverly Hillbillies
I knew this wasn't a top notch film production, and that's alright. I watch these types of movies all the time. That being said the premise of the story was great, however, *LAST CHANCE SPOILER ALERT* I knew it was going to go down hill when the protagonist's goal was achieved very early in the movie. Because of this, there was nowhere really else to go other than the protagonist saving the day in ways that were a bit drawn out, thereby losing their point in the process.
It was good for a few laughs. Good to see once.
Brooklyn Nine-Nine (2013)
Laugh Out Loud Hilarity!
I must admit that I was a bit reluctant to see this show because I was really tired of seeing cop dramas. But to my surprise this was not a cop drama but rather a comedy. Brooklyn Nine-Nine really does bring a satirical vibe that encompasses all cop shows.
Andy Samberg and Andre Braugher really play off each other well that never gets boring, always leaving you wanting more. The rest of the cast is just as hilarious as they play off/react to Samberg's goofy character, Jake. Everyone's somewhat serious nature becomes funny because of their reaction to Jake; a character that can be serious but enjoys being mischievous in order to pass the time.
Notably, throughout the show there's plenty of character development which is always a plus for me when watching any TV show.
I know this series is still brand new, but I hope that it continues for a while. Truly after a long day, I watch this show and I laugh so hard that sometimes I can barely breathe! I would ask my wife for help, but she is also laughing so hard at the show, she can barely breathe!
Congratulations to the writers, the screenwriters, and the actors on a hilarious satire!
Bellflower (2011)
Pick negative adjective
This is a movie developed by a group of people that think if a film contains vague dialogue, random incidents, out of focus camera angles and covering the screen with film grain rather than a good plot that it's going to be a cool, edgy original film. SPOILER ALERT: ITS NOT!
Everybody's acting in this film was more painful to watch than witnessing how veal is made. And listening to them deliver their dialogue was about as bad as listening to fingernails on a blackboard.
But acting and delivering lines aside, the characters were Grade 'A' delinquents; all of them were reprehensible with no redeemable or likable qualities whatsoever. Their main goal in the movie was so adolescent for their age, it was laughable and embarrassing.
I would think that's the best way to understand this movie would be to be stoned out of your mind which I am NOT advocating anybody do.
So in my opinion, watch at the risk of wasting your time. Meanwhile, Bellflower has been uprooted from my queue.
Black and White (1999)
More Painful to Watch Than Old Women Knitting
This is a real pathetic attempt at a modern-day film noir. The concept was good, but was truly executed poorly! Starting first with:
DIALOGUE - Excruciatingly painful. The dialogue between characters was similar to a screen test gone wrong. Some conversations seemed mismatched. At some points in the movie it seemed that conversing characters' lines weren't matching. If this was an editing error, then its an embarrassing one.
STORYLINE/PLOT - Very transparent; a person born blind and deaf could see what was going to happen before it happened and is finality. And what was the point keeping certain aspects of the story a secret?!? There was no mystery about this movie whatsoever! (Except the mystery about how it was given the green light) And what was with the ending? It was so asinine, I'm not even going attribute it any space in this review. I will say this: if it was a way of bringing the story around, it was a sad attempt.
CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT - Big zero! I'm not even sure who this movie was about. Apparently, the writers hadn't the first clue who the main character was; her or him? And their own story didn't mesh; it was very amateur. Also, I don't really believe that the main character - at his age whose living in LA - is THAT pious and innocent. And let's say - JUST FOR THE SAKE OF ARGUMENT - if this character really was that pious and innocent, he wouldn't break so easily. And if this story was about him I would think that his decline would've been the main focus; perhaps delved into a bit more. But alas, it wasn't.
In conclusion: this movie was so pathetically embarrassing, don't tell anyone you saw it.
Lime Salted Love (2006)
Disturbingly Spellbinding!
Truly in the vein of David Lynch and Darren Aronofsky.
I am going to be honest, this movie made me a little ill to watch straight through considering all the dark nature of the film. So brace thyself - not for the faint of heart.
The story/plot was very unique and had a lot of depth to it. There were some scenes that were quite eerie and graphically disturbing (e.g. drug use; child abuse). I personally felt it wasn't for shock value or just for the sake of doing it 'in the name of art.' Each incident related to another, revealing characters' background; it progressed the story along, but such scenes can be very nauseating and despicable!
The movie is meant to be cryptic and mysterious, thusly the verbal interaction between characters were purposely going to be slightly vague. However, I believe that the dialogue could have been better, or delivered better.
I also think that Danielle Agnello, Joe Hall, and Billy Drago all have a brain for telling and relating stories in a mysterious, surreal manner. I am not familiar with their work, this is my first time seeing anything they ever worked on, and their writing/directing was impressive.
So in conclusion, I believe this movie is well worth the watch provided you are not so easily disturbed or that it might set off your own psychosis.
Silent But Deadly (2012)
Off Beat - and Not Just the Humor
I expected this movie to be ridiculous, over-the-top, and crude. And because of its relatively low-budget, I also expected the acting, the special effects, and the storyline to be sub-par. However, the worst of all was - in my amateur opinion - the editing! Some scenes looked as if they should have been cut long after the joke was delivered, rather than dragging it on as if the writers were patronizing the audience saying, "DO'YA GET IT? DO'YA GET IT? FORGET YOU! WE THOUGHT IT WAS FUNNY, WE'RE DRAGGING IT ON!" And many scenes looked as if they really, REALLY belonged on the cutting room floor; they neither contributed to the overall plot or moved the story along.
This is not to say that the story was by any means fast-paced. The story was in fact slower than molasses running uphill in December. And by randomly throwing in Bruce Vilanch towards the end of the movie, was that somehow going to make up for the hour that I was tormented? NO!
My opinion is this: I have visited relatives in retirement AND convalescent homes, and just a single facility - I believe - actually possesses a livelier pulse than this movie.
Coopers' Camera (2008)
Well Carbonated Then Fizzled Out
How I keep finding these movies that are all shot on a camcorder I'll never know. Personally I hate this style of filming for many reasons. There are very, very, very, VERY few movies I like that are shot like this.
This story takes place in 1985 where a clueless and pathetic husband/father buys a camcorder for Christmas and he decides to record their holiday family gathering. His youngest son gets his hand on the camcorder and starts to record every embarrassing family moment and every family secret which spirals into a web of hilarity.
'Coopers' Christmas' starts out like a fresh carbonated soda; cool and effervescent. Then it fizzles out and becomes stale. The jokes seemed to become predictable and unimaginative (probably due to the binge drinking the main characters participate in). Then we're reduced to seeing 'shock humor' (e.g. excessive vomiting, toilet humor) which I find funny in a comedy, but it seemed drawn-out and overdone. It seemed as if all the relatively good jokes spanned from beginning to the middle, then it goes down hill from there.
And I've stressed this before regarding this movie style that during a dramatic point, nobody is not thinking "get the camera so we can tape this!" Especially since this story takes place in 1985, that wasn't the knee-jerk reaction for people. And how is it that the youngest figured out how to work the new camcorder? I have had one of those camcorders from the 1980s, and I'm telling you they were not user-friendly. So maybe an explanation would have been good unless I missed it, but I am certainly not going to re-watch it for that one minor glitch.
So I watched it once, but for sure not watching it again.
The Martian (2015)
2001 meets Cast Away
When the wife wanted to see this movie, I was skeptical. I was really exhausted with seeing sci-fi movies that go nowhere in plot, story, or depth. So when I heard about this movie entitled 'The Martian', I was reluctant to see it.
Going into the theater with the mindset that it was going to be another stereotypical, cliché sci-fi flick, much to my pleasant surprise I was sorely mistaken.
There was an A-List cast; each actor gave a splendid performance, playing off each other and lending to an overall magnificent performance. The focus on the plot was clear; nothing detracted from it. But would you really expect anything less from veteran director (I discovered at the end credits) Ridley Scott? Scott is a director who is very passionate about his profession which is clearly seen in this masterful work of art.
When this movie is over, you'll be leaving the theater pleased with your decision. I do suggest, however, that you buy yourself and your date the XL popcorn and soda due to the length of the film - but its got depth, so a lengthy movie such as this is okay.
Almost Human (2013)
Watchable Once
Its an independent film with decent acting that wasn't painful to watch. Each actor lent a very good performance. However, the female lead (in comparison to the other actors) seemed as if she wasn't sure how to act, react or even was familiar with her lines; that was a bit distracting.
The movie kept me in suspense, despite random predictability. The directing/cinematography was immersing me into its world, while some shots I felt were too rushed or unnecessary.
It is worth a watch just to see something familiar done a little differently.
Hangar 10 (2014)
More Painful to Watch Than Observing a Doctor Botch A Vasectomy
Another failed attempt to film in the style of the Blair Witch Project. The difference in this movie is that it takes place in England. Three young people decide to tackle a conspiracy known as 'Hanger 10', I'm guessing like the United States' Area 51. The movie was painfully slow, much like watching a train wreck in slow motion.
The camera angles were worse than your average movie filmed in this manner. There seemed to be about two or three cameras, yet in some scenes it seems that there is a random third camera, (basically a camera not belonging to the main characters') almost as if the director was cheating for a better camera shot. If its going to try to be a videotape type film, it should stick with that.
In the end there seemed to be no resolution, finishing anticlimactic, not really explaining some of the inconsistencies they encountered. After certain scenes you are left wondering what a particular situation was about, wondering how the characters survived.
Overall I think it could have been a lot better. I would not be watching it a second time. In fact, I'm in the process of building a time machine so I can stop myself from seeing this.
Infection (2005)
I've had more enjoyment watching peoples' vacation videos!
I realized before watching this movie that it was an amateur film, the budget was low, and the acting was not going to be top notch. However, this wasn't the case with this movie. Rather this movie was was prime, grade A garbage! First of all, the most basic laptops have video editing equipment. This movie wasn't edited in any way. I realize the director was attempting to do something different by making a (supposedly) constant, no break or cut in the film. Newsflash: it didn't work. Camera tricks could've been used to make it APPEAR that there were no breaks in the film like what Alfred Hitchcock did in his movie, 'Rope'. Would've made a quicker paced, evenly flowed film.
Next, why is there a music score in a film that is supposedly 'reality'? It was completely out of place. Such films like The Blair Witch, Crow's Next, VHS doesn't have one. If this wasn't shot in the manner that it was in, then a musical score would've been acceptable. But in this case, it jacked up the movie even more.
Lastly, the atrocious acting the dragged on like fingernails on a blackboard. It seemed as if the actors weren't responding appropriately to the post production audio. It was such distraction, it was so laughable.
In conclusion: this is a 'D' movie that isn't worth watching to laugh or make fun at; it's really just a waste of time.
The Brass Teapot (2012)
A Fantastic Work of Art - A True Classic!
This is how a story SHOULD be written! Filled with depth, a fantastic plot, likable characters you can identify with, twists and turns; The Brass Teapot doesn't disappoint. And the actors all give a splendid performance! It truly is the best movie I saw that year! I tip my hat to the writers and the director for making a superb film.
When this movie came out on Netflix, I was somewhat skeptical to see it given that there wasn't enough information in the description. The contributing factor to seeing this, was seeing a picture of Juno Temple cradling the brass teapot in her arms as she lied in bed. I was interested in knowing what the movie was about, and what was so important about this teapot. And I thoroughly enjoyed it!