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Reviews
Gekijôban Spy x Family Code: White (2023)
Very entertaing and funny even if you've not finished the show
Not seen the TV show, or only seen the first season? Doesn't matter, the movie explains the main characters, their skills and secrets within a fake family, all within the space of 5-10 mins. This is an extended episode which starts out as another attempt to aid Anya (the telepathic adopted daughter) in her academics so loid (the spy working to keep pace between 2 nations) can get close to his target, leads to a winter wonderland ingredient hunt, a potential break in his fake relationship with yor (the assassin) and Anya getting caught up a major threat to peace. The humour is mad as ever, mostly coming from the the characters doing what they do whilst trying to not worry the others as to who they really are
The animation is more detailed for plenty of moments, and there's large chunks of action at the end which even gives yor a chance to shine.
If you've never seen spy family before, don't take it seriously, the amount of things that yor should question about loid is unreal, and yet she doesn't. There was one moment of comedy that was going on for so long about a cruise subject that it became cringe..... Then it went so surreal it became brilliantly hilarious. I enjoyed this film as an adult, it's mostly kid friendly though there is one scene with animated blood, and one scene of particularly dark peril towards a child.
Pending Train (2023)
Would have been better as a short thriller movie
What we have here is basically the Asian version of the TV show "lost", but with an explanation for everything within 1 season of 10 episodes. Japan is hit by an earthquake event that somehow triggers a moving train to be thrown into another world. In this world, the passengers of car 5 must find a way to get on with each other and survive in a strange territory.
I was initially intrigued by all of this, until I realised I would be spending each episode listening to the same piece of music over and over that tries to rouse some emotion out of you.
Characters achieve something towards survival, play music, show show mo emotional faces.
Characters realise a new strength, play music and show emotional faces in show motion.
Characters sneeze, play music and show slow mo faces.
It's terrible and makes up the overwhelming playtime of the show, especially when throwing in a love triangle and people delving into flashbacks of their previous lives. It's even funny when something bad is happening, yet upbeat sounding music starts playing
If it were shortened to just the bare minimum melodrama, it would be alright.... ish. The last 2 episodes do a lot more for me but I can't really spoil much. Was the stock footage at the end necessary though, it's more cheap cheese thrown on top.
Dungeons & Dragons: Honor Among Thieves (2023)
Thumbs up from a non-D&D watcher
Never played dungeons and dragons, I just know of it
Story: a father who fell into a life of thievery leaves prison to make up with his daughter and find a tablet that can bring his wife back from the dead, only for a traitor and a sorcerer with dark plans to come into the mix.
This was a belting mix of fantasy and humour, not too over the top like how Thor love and thunder went, some good action scenes, interesting set ups (people who have played the game portal will find a particularly great use of the concept in magic), great visuals (a lot of which is real physical landscapes). Liked all of the main characters, maybe iffy with Simon for all his self doubting, but overall liked them all. Give this movie a go even if you're not of full on lord of the rings nerdishness.
The Super Mario Bros. Movie (2023)
Great family movie for the Nintendo fans
The evil Bowser threatens the peaceful mushroom kingdom, only Mario, the Italian plumber who sounds like Chris Pratt can save the day
This was amazing for me even as an adult, I was spotting all the game references left right and center (visual items, characters, music). However, I will admit that adults with no prior Mario experience may find the despicable me movies by the same studio better overall. If you see critics giving less than 7/10, still do best to ignore them
Also, people said they didn't like the idea of Chris Pratt as Mario's voice, shortly in you aren't even bothered by it, and the original Mario voice actor is given a cameo
Shout out to Jack black who nails it, both as Bowser, and as a tenacious d piano moment.
65 (2023)
Entertaining but not perfect action, jump scare and child bonding flick.... With dinosaurs
"65 million years ago, before the advent of man..."
I laughed after seeing this on screen, only to see humans shortly after. Before the advent of man, but quite clearly people are here, not blue alien things or anything. During the end credits we see the aftermath of the asteroid hit over time, only to see a human city appear, so humans visit millions of years ago, nothing in-between, then humans out of nowhere exactly as they looked 65 million years ago, ugh
Now I've got that out of the way, it is an alright movie. Transporter who takes a 2 year job to earn money to treat his sick daughter (she has a tiny cough, bless her) end up getting knocked off course by unexpected space rock activity. Crash landing onto a green planet, he finds only one survivor from the suspension pods, a little girl who cannot speak English. He takes her under his wing with thoughts of his own daughter, to get them to a way of the planet. They just have to survive.... Dinosaurs (it's earth they crashed onto, not a spoiler as it states it on screen and you'll guess between the 65m years and the dinos themselves). Plenty of people will be entertained by the action and interaction and bonding between the 2, while some people won't warm to them enough to care. I enjoyed the movie just enough at cinema to be worth it. Now it does use jump scares in places, and the moment involving timing with steam was hilariously convenient.
Busanhaeng (2016)
Pretty fun zombie movie
Firstly, never seen any zombie movie use trains as a set piece before, and it's an interesting aspect as you are trapped in a very different sense, the movie makes good use of this in terms of how to evade or not be able to evade in a thin metal tube. The zombies also have their senses given, in terms of sight and hearing, though there are a couple of occasions the movie forgets it's own rules. The zombies in this are pretty menacing for their speed, they don't stagger, they run, they jump, they even comedically pile on top of each other. The latter aspect works both ways though, sometimes it just like terrible like a scene out of world war z, other times it does give them genuine power. Inconsistencies are sometimes shown when a batch of zombies can sometimes break a doors glass, and sometimes can't.
Plot wise, the outbreak is very obvious and grounded, nothing supernatural. The main arc is a guy who is usually buried in his job and useless with his daughter, taking said daughter to Busan to see the mother. He gets to develop when he becomes more responsible than ever during events. There's also a mix of supports including preggers lady, captain of the train, and the obligatory selfish guy who would sacrifice and manipulate others for his own survival. The film can't always be taken seriously with some of it's dumber action moments, but was still a great watch with some scenes that grabbed me. That ending.....
Violent Night (2022)
Bad Santa + Die hard + Home Alone + decapitations
I thought the trailer looked potentially funny, but not likely to work when you watch the full film. Surprisingly it did. David harbour plays the real deal Santa Claus, who had lost belief in what he does because of the generations of kids who just expect video games and cash for Christmas. He ends up stumbling into a money heist at the home of a wealthy but dysfunctional family, and despite trying to avoid the situation, the young girl in trouble asking for help us just too much for him to ignore.
Let's be clear, this is inappropriate for kids. From how bad Santa has become (swearing, drinking) to how messy the film gets with blood and decapitation. And it's that that makes the film entertaining, of only because there's not too much like it. The heist is very die hard (with plenty of references), a 5 min home alone tribute that turns things up a notch compared to McCauley culkins efforts. The fights with Santa aren't 100% great, but he always finishes well
The bad thing with this movie is the family overall. The kid is cute enough, but everyone else is annoying. In some ways it's intentional, there's meant to be a couple of good eggs in a family full of vain rich annoyances, but still not entertaining on their end. Also, as entertaining as the movie is, it is silly, don't expect clever writing, but just go with it (I mainly have it a go for stranger things David harbour, legend)