svader Reviews

His Secret Marriage (2019 TV Movie)

OMG

[1/10 · 1 September 2022]

I don't normally mi.d a lifetime hallmarky type movie in the afternoon when in the kitchen busy with other things. They are uncomplicated, easy watching and although they will never gain an Oscar for any actor, they pass the time. However this movie belittles the viewers intelligence and mocks our right to common sense TV.

So where do I start.

1. Dog walker sees two perfectly positioned peoe lying on the ground on the side of a hill with some tomato ketchup on their heads. What does she do. Rush to them to see if they are breathing and comfort them? Pull her mobile and call 911? No she runs off down the road shouting she's going to get help!!

2. Kelsey awakes from a 2 day coma. She remembers that she wasn't married, if that makes sense.

3. Kelsey's parents are asking for permission from the thunderbird lookalike husband to come and see their daughter who has been in a coma for two days?

4. No calls or messages or any visits from her friends. Where are they?

5. How wonderful that you can have alleged horrific accident and then wake from a two day coma with full perfect make up

6. I don't remember you blà blà blà . .where are the pictures he could present, text messages, calls etc etc

This has to be one of the stupidest films I have ever attempted to watch. I have to say attempted as I couldn't make it past twenty minutes.

I have some paint drying in another room and would rather watch that!!

I don't normally mi.d a lifetime hallmarky type movie in the afternoon when in the kitchen busy with other things. They are uncomplicated, easy watching and although they will never gain an Oscar for any actor, they pass the time. However this movie belittles the viewers intelligence and mocks our right to common sense TV.

So where do I start.

1. Dog walker sees two perfectly positioned peoe lying on the ground on the side of a hill with some tomato ketchup on their heads. What does she do. Rush to them to see if they are breathing and comfort them? Pull her mobile and call 911? No she runs off down the road shouting she's going to get help!!

2. Kelsey awakes from a 2 day coma. She remembers that she wasn't married, if that makes sense.

3. Kelsey's parents are asking for permission from the thunderbird lookalike husband to come and see their daughter who has been in a coma for two days?

4. No calls or messages or any visits from her friends. Where are they?

5. How wonderful that you can have alleged horrific accident and then wake from a two day coma with full perfect make up

6. I don't remember you blà blà blà . .where are the pictures he could present, text messages, calls etc etc

This has to be one of the stupidest films I have ever attempted to watch. I have to say attempted as I couldn't make it past twenty minutes.

I have some paint drying in another room and would rather watch that!!

I don't normally mi.d a lifetime hallmarky type movie in the afternoon when in the kitchen busy with other things. They are uncomplicated, easy watching and although they will never gain an Oscar for any actor, they pass the time. However this movie belittles the viewers intelligence and mocks our right to common sense TV.

So where do I start.

1. Dog walker sees two perfectly positioned peoe lying on the ground on the side of a hill with some tomato ketchup on their heads. What does she do. Rush to them to see if they are breathing and comfort them? Pull her mobile and call 911? No she runs off down the road shouting she's going to get help!!

2. Kelsey awakes from a 2 day coma. She remembers that she wasn't married, if that makes sense.

3. Kelsey's parents are asking for permission from the thunderbird lookalike husband to come and see their daughter who has been in a coma for two days?

4. No calls or messages or any visits from her friends. Where are they?

5. How wonderful that you can have alleged horrific accident and then wake from a two day coma with full perfect make up

6. I don't remember you blà blà blà . .where are the pictures he could present, text messages, calls etc etc

This has to be one of the stupidest films I have ever attempted to watch. I have to say attempted as I couldn't make it past twenty minutes.

I have some paint drying in another room and would rather watch that!!

I don't normally mi.d a lifetime hallmarky type movie in the afternoon when in the kitchen busy with other things. They are uncomplicated, easy watching and although they will never gain an Oscar for any actor, they pass the time. However this movie belittles the viewers intelligence and mocks our right to common sense TV.

So where do I start.

1. Dog walker sees two perfectly positioned peoe lying on the ground on the side of a hill with some tomato ketchup on their heads. What does she do. Rush to them to see if they are breathing and comfort them? Pull her mobile and call 911? No she runs off down the road shouting she's going to get help!!

2. Kelsey awakes from a 2 day coma. She remembers that she wasn't married, if that makes sense.

3. Kelsey's parents are asking for permission from the thunderbird lookalike husband to come and see their daughter who has been in a coma for two days?

4. No calls or messages or any visits from her friends. Where are they?

5. How wonderful that you can have alleged horrific accident and then wake from a two day coma with full perfect make up

6. I don't remember you blà blà blà . .where are the pictures he could present, text messages, calls etc etc

This has to be one of the stupidest films I have ever attempted to watch. I have to say attempted as I couldn't make it past twenty minutes.

I have some paint drying in another room and would rather watch that!!

I don't normally mi.d a lifetime hallmarky type movie in the afternoon when in the kitchen busy with other things. They are uncomplicated, easy watching and although they will never gain an Oscar for any actor, they pass the time. However this movie belittles the viewers intelligence and mocks our right to common sense TV.

So where do I start.

1. Dog walker sees two perfectly positioned peoe lying on the ground on the side of a hill with some tomato ketchup on their heads. What does she do. Rush to them to see if they are breathing and comfort them? Pull her mobile and call 911? No she runs off down the road shouting she's going to get help!!

2. Kelsey awakes from a 2 day coma. She remembers that she wasn't married, if that makes sense.

3. Kelsey's parents are asking for permission from the thunderbird lookalike husband to come and see their daughter who has been in a coma for two days?

4. No calls or messages or any visits from her friends. Where are they?

5. How wonderful that you can have alleged horrific accident and then wake from a two day coma with full perfect make up

6. I don't remember you blà blà blà . .where are the pictures he could present, text messages, calls etc etc

This has to be one of the stupidest films I have ever attempted to watch. I have to say attempted as I couldn't make it past twenty minutes.

I have some paint drying in another room and would rather watch that!!

Nope (2022)

Helllllllp!!!?

[2/10 · 26 August 2022]

Hi Everyone.

I have no idea what I have just watched.

It was a disjointed mismatch of characters which although intentional did not mix well.

I found that I didn't care for anyone of them.

There were so many stolen ideas from so many other movies it was untrue.

I'd give this one a wide berth. It's a two hour film of nonsense. Best acting was done by the horses.

Red Rose (2022)

BBC Please!!

[3/10 · 24 August 2022]

Another poor drama? From BBC.

There is nothing much worse than 20+ year old actors playing school children. Awful.

So episode one was not bad and then. . . . and then it dragged and dragged and dragged.

Made it to episode 5 and gave up. Drink, a bit of staring at a mobile, a bit of chatting, more staring at mobile phone. That about sums it all up. No idea who the target audiey is or what this is actually about.

If the message is that social media is destroying then maybe they should look at the parents in this show. A drunk, two that allow their kids to sleep with each other, another that has no ambition. I thought they were more toxic than RR.

Watch if you like to have something on in the background.

Skip of you are sane.

Kamikaze (2021)

Very Good

[7/10 · 19 August 2022]

First episode I thought it was going to be a teen ranting and raving following the deaths of her family. It wasn't.

The lead character Julie made a very good exploration of herself and brilliantly acted and supposed by her male encounters on her journey.

Only flaw was the visit to the crash site. All of the wreckage was there still and easily accessed. In real life this would have all been removed for forensic examination.

The Living and the Dead (2016)

Hum drum

[4/10 · 14 August 2022]

Good start, decent middle, convoluted and rushed finale

In parts a great comedy. Pulling the VW out the marsh, a roaring great fire in the house in the middle of Summer . . .need I go on.

What happened to Gwen?

Ended terribly for me. Especially the very last scene. Why did you kill your wife. Yawn.

Parked (III) (2010)

Good start

[2/10 · 11 August 2022]

I liked the look of this and the storyline sounded interesting

It is ok up to the first half then before you know it it is over with a poor ending.

I didn't care for either of the characters and didn't feel it was as harrowing as some are miking out. In fact I would say it was very weak in parts.

Stupid Young Heart (2018)

Gritty

[1/10 · 9 August 2022]

Boring and non engaging. The only thing gritty about this is the already done on numerous occasions storyline.

I didn't care for the characters and their stupid behaviour or what happened to them.

Give this one a miss.

Murina (2021)

Horrible

[1/10 · 2 August 2022]

Felt uncomfortable watching this even ten minutes in.

One of the guys says to the dad. . .why your daughter walking around naked to provoke people.

Then you have the friend arrive pawing all over the main protagonist. Add all this to the amount of times you hear her name in the first ten minutes this out me off watching.

Paper Girls (2022)

Nonsense

[6/10 · 2 August 2022]

This can be on in the background an you won't really miss anything. I wasn't convinced by the awful costumes and the whole story was nonsense.

Didn't care for any of the characters at all which after eight episode there should be a hint of viewer sentiment.

Not sure who it is targeted to either children, young adults who?

Confusing and forgettable.

Black Crab (2022)

Noomi Noomi Noomi

[7/10 · 25 July 2022]

As many of said. This isn't one of Noomis best movies but it's an easy watch.

Not a complicated plot and entertaining with good action scenes.

I'm sure some leave a low rating for the sake of it.

Why ask. . . Why aren't they using helicopters? They say throughout the movie they will be going across a lake in effect behind enemy lines. Have to wonder if some critics actually watch the film.

Deja Vu (2006)

Irritating

[4/10 · 24 July 2022]

Not one of DWs best but ok to pass some time.

I glazed over when they started talking and shouty about worm holes and changing time etc. As it's a total impossibility I just switched off.

The Uninvited (2009)

Not Bad

[6/10 · 24 July 2022]

Not a bad movie but not brilliant as the plot has more holes than Swiss cheese and can be worked out in the first ten minutes of the film.

The sherrif is dumb. The dad is dumb and everyone else just can't act.

Doubt (I) (2008)

Brilliant

[8/10 · 28 June 2022]

Seymour and Street have fantasy chemistry. The scene where Street chastizes Seymour for what may or may not have happened is fantastic.

Good support from all of the remaining actors also.

Some of the goods on this film are hideously wrong.

Breeders (2020–2023)

Mmmmmmh!!!!

[2/10 · 24 June 2022]

Two of my favourite British actors in this crass hotchpot of a show.

Irrespective of what all the swearing is about I just didn't get it.

Couldn't make it past the first episode of season one.

Rubbish.

Shoplifters Scammers & Pickpockets (2021– )

Daft

[1/10 · 24 June 2022]

Only Channel 5 would show this programme. It's awful.

Follows some kids, who are supposed to be security, around empty shops. Then they make their BIG busts to stop people shoplifting.

This week's it's underwear and eem nothing and eem nothing.

Stupid show about nothing.

Yellowjackets (2021– )

Oh Dear

[2/10 · 22 June 2022]

I should have known this was going to be awful from the opening scene.

I'm not sure any of those girls have ever seen a football let alone play football.

This is just a saga of nothing happening. I'm 3 in and it's very poor. Ok I guess if you're mid late teens and not very bright.

Blade Runner 2049 (2017)

Great Visuals

[3/10 · 19 June 2022]

I liked the cinematography, the special effects and the general dystopian view.

However at points of the movie I found myself asking "what is going on". I literally had no clue what I was watching.

I only made it 1hr and 15 minutes in and had to switch off. It bored the life out of me. Little or no action and RG mumbling his way through a daft script of nonsense.

Star Trek: Strange New Worlds (2022– )

Oh Dear

[2/10 · 12 June 2022]

I always start my unfavorable reviews with Oh Dear..

What is this rubbish.

Boring, no story and nearly as bad as some of the dumb reviews.

I watched 2 episodes and literally nil happens. Just a load of characters mumbling to each other about nothing.

Absolute pants.

Goose Bumps: The Movie (2012)

Daft

[1/10 · 19 May 2022]

One of the stupidesy movies i have ever strted to watch

Trrrible acting and over reactions to everything

Storyline is non existant and i didnt carr for any character.

The Northman (2022)

Dull

[4/10 · 15 May 2022]

I struggled to understand what was being said and only watched half an hour.

Found it to be uninteresting and quite dull.

Nicoke Kidman has made some questionable tv series and movies recently and this is another example of this.

Shark: The Beginning (2021)

Impartial Review

[3/10 · 8 May 2022]

School without teachers

Young offenders institution with no guards

30 year old plus actors pretending to be 18

Incredulous story

Slow boring pace

Nothing happens in the first 45 minutes. I couldn't endure anymore.

Fabricated City (2017)

Dumb

[1/10 · 2 May 2022]

One of the stupidest and dumbest movies i have ever seen.

The so called acting just involves everyone screaming all the way through the movie. The story is unbelievable and I wasted my time wanting so plausible to happen.

Dartmoor Killing (2015)

Ok

[1/10 · 21 April 2022]

Dumb story, dumb film, dumb chavvy women on a daft walk. Anyone got me that for a present I would never be friends with them ever again.

No story, no plot. So the pervy fake ranger has a sprained ankle. I know . . We are two girls alone without somewhere to go nearby to stay so we shall get you home. How daft.

Wired Shut (2021)

Wired Shut

[1/10 · 19 April 2022]

It was Wired Somo and I would have said shut.

Dumbest, slowest and most boring movie I have seen this year.

Daughter can't act, dad actually looks like a down and out and the whe thing is just a slow train to nowhere.

Fragile (2005)

Wow

[2/10 · 19 April 2022]

Great orchestral opening music, great landscape and wide angle shots follow Allie MC Beale to the children's hospital that's closing but has more staff than patients.

Awful film with no atmosphere and zero horror takes place.

Was made in 2006/2005 but seems like 40 years old.

CF is supposed to be a night receptionist but is always being nosey and bugging people in the day.

Stuck in a lift CF starts a crazy panic for no reason. Terrible acting. Dumb maintenance guy opens the lift on the wrong floor. You can clearly see when he looks up the shaft the lift comes down and past at least three floors before it gets to him then another 3/4 floor s after. Yet when there is an outside shot of the building it's only 4)5 story's high lol.