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tibetanpunk
Reviews
AVPR: Aliens vs Predator - Requiem (2007)
Aliens vs Predaturd
This film and the 1st AvP film both all over the whole Aliens and Predator franchise.
They are awful films, badly acted, badly scripted and terribly directed. They just seem like someones desperate attempt to make money off of the good name of the original aliens and predator films but instead of delivering a well thought out, quality production, they came up with the predaturd.
The original Alien/Aliens/Predator/Predator 2 films were great, they redefined the horror/thriller genre by inventing these insane (and yet still believable) creatures who took the role of the 'serial killer', as opposed to a human.
These films are just milking the franchise and do nothing but darken its name.
The Aliens vs Predator comic books were brilliant and had a great story. They were true to the Alien/Predator mythology, didn't crap all over the original stories etc... Why didn't they make the comic book into a great film? Because Hollywood are idiots, thats why.
Spider-Man 3 (2007)
Poor sequel to a great sequel.
I love the Spiderman franchise, I thought that Spiderman 2 was an amazing film and when I heard that Venom was going to be in this film I thought "Hey, this could be awesome...They have the chance to make a really amazing sequel here!" and I was quite excited about seeing it. By all rights this film should have been a very dark and moody affair, especially when Spiderman starts to become 'posessed' by the black suit. Instead what happened was Parker turns into a cheesy EMO kid and the result is somewhat of a joke, rather than being given the seriousness it deserved in terms of psychological inner turmoil... Venom should have had a Golum-like split personality, but even the existence of the symbiote's personality was absent in this film...Which was why Spiderman decided the suit was not for him in the comics...He became aware of its motives and how it was trying to take him over like a parasite, he rejected the suit and then it found a willing partner with Brock because they both hated/resented Parker and Spiderman... Venom should have sounded like some kind of messed up lizard/demon...Instead they just gave him the voice of Brock...Which was really weak. As well, Venom should have been much bulkier and bigger in general...Most of my problems with this film are with the whole 'black suit' thing which they used to advertise this film and it ended up feeling like false advertising...It should have been awesome, but everything about it was cheesy and overacted...There was too much singing and dancing and not enough depth...
4: Rise of the Silver Surfer (2007)
Great fun movie suitable for the whole family.
Compared to other super hero adventures that came out this year (and even last year.. Spiderman 3, Ghost rider, X-men 3, Transformers...All disappointing) this film actually delivered what you expected. I fully expected this film to be a fairly straight forward special effects/humour driven movie and not to be taken too seriously and that is what it was. Unlike Spiderman 3 and Ghost rider, which should have been much darker/serious films but ended up being fairly cheesy affairs (was there really any need for the whole singing and dancing thing in Spiderman?) this film was just good fun and I came away satisfied. Recommended for super hero fans, probably won't appeal to those that don't appreciate the genre.
Transformers (2007)
It is just so much fancy screwing gum for the eyes with a bit of comedy thrown in...
I can just imagine all these over paid, self important movie producer people sitting around a table 'musing' about what should be in the film 'Transformers' that would make it a 'box office hit'...That in itself would probably make a great comedy. Or maybe they knew it was an assured hit so they just put a load of monkeys in a room with a type writer... The people behind this film had no regard for the depth of the original Transformers story and were seemingly ignorant of it. This film is only worthy of being called Transformers in the most shallow sense.
You really know a movie is bad when a TV advert for a fairly bland looking family hatchback car makes a more convincing looking transformer than the movie did...One that you could actually tell it was a car, after it transformed. AND, even though the 'transformer' in the advert was just a plain old family car it still managed to come off as way cooler and much more authentic... Maybe the team behind that advert should have been given the job of doing the CGI on this film?
It seems that you can slap a big name on a movie like 'Transformers' or 'Aliens vs Predator' or 'Star wars' but then make it so bad that it does a good job of ruining the credibility of the franchise which was originally great...But it is OK, the people behind it have made so much money from basically screwing the movie going public that they don't care what you think...Sigh
The movie industry wonders why sales are down and people don't go to the cinema any more...Are they really that blind? I can fully understand why people would download a pirated version of piece of cr*p films like this rather than pay £6 to see it in the cinema...They just aren't worth paying for... It is just so much fancy screwing gum for the eyes with a bit of comedy thrown in....'Transformers' meets 'fast and furious' meets 'american pie'....Morons....Box office hit? Box office sh*t more like...
Accepted (2006)
Goofy film intended to inspire the under achiever....
This is a funny, clever film and well worth your time. In my opinion it is much better than American Pie and other films of the same genre that seem to get knocked out all the time. I hadn't heard of this film, so I guess it didn't get much press, which is kind of a shame. It doesn't take itself too seriously but at the same time delivers a serious message to people about life and life experiences and what is important...As opposed to a film about a bunch of desperate guys trying to get laid for the first time and one dude sticking his d**k in a pie, but in the end everyone gets laid and whoop-de-do... One thing that impressed me was that the soundtrack was pretty awesome and not the usual cheesy American pop-punk...They actually had real punk from back in the day like the Ramones...That in itself made the film better! To be honest I wasn't expecting much from this film and I was pleasantly surprised at how good a comedy it is.