Review of Diana

Diana (2013)
1/10
A colossal disappointment, just a total mess of what could have been a masterpiece
9 February 2014
Warning: Spoilers
I suppose I had decent expectations for Diana. I thought Naomi Watts could be brilliant in the role and certainly a woman like Princess Diana has an incredible story to be told. They could have focused on any point in her public life from her marriage to Charles right through to her untimely, horrifying and forever remembered death. This particular film goes halfway between all that and decides to focus primarily on a fling she had after Prince Charles, the most lacklustre and pointless story to possibly tell. To be honest, I was lost. I knew nothing about this man she had a relationship with and they portrayed both of them with such little regard to character or personality that I was bored to tears. I literally forced my way through it hoping that there would be something redeemable...there wasn't. This was the most forgettable portrayal of a cultural icon I have ever seen and it was forgettable while I was watching it, not just after. They casually throw in her philanthropic work, pointless forced scenes of her work with land-mine awareness and third world country. The emotional scenes were reduced to melodramatic ridiculous teen-lust cryfests that made this the most bizarre biopic I have ever seen.

I really thought Naomi Watts would be brilliant casting for Princess Diana. She certainly looks the part and she is a terrific actress. The script is deplorable and wrecks havoc on any potential performance Watts could give. She looks and sounds bored until her ridiculous emotional breakdowns over her heart surgeon which they portray her as being nearly obsessive over. Princess Diana is a beloved figure regardless of her flaws and they did nothing to capture that and sadly neither did Watts. Naveen Andrews of Lost fame plays her lover. I've never heard of the man and I actually think Andrews did an okay job, just barely adequate given how bad the script was. I can't speak to the chemistry between Watts and Andrews because there was none...literally. It was like watching brother and sister only not even family chemistry existed. If this was a passionate affair, none of that was there. He was bleak and boring too and then he would shot melodramatically for five minutes and then back to bleak and boring. As a Lost fan I think Andrews is talented and its unfortunate this will do nothing to further his career. There is no one else worth mentioning...no one. People come and go and I couldn't even tell you who they were I was so bored to utter tears.

How dare whoever came up with this idea put Oliver Hirschbiegel in charge of this project. The guy comes from SCIENCE FICTION FILMS AND TV and not even good versions. We are talking about a B-director at best and I can't imagine he had any interest in doing this and his boredom translates perfectly onto this piece of mess. Just to make sure the nail was thoroughly in this coffin, screenwriter Stephen Jeffrey's has a whopping two credits to his name including this dud. It would appear to me that no one cared enough about this project and that is honestly just a HUGE shame. They missed some massive potential here and under professional talent with experience, this could have swept the Oscars and instead deserves to sweep the Razzies. Don't bother...not even out of morbid curiosity. This is a travesty. I didn't want to believe the negative reviews...but they're all true. A deserving 1/10 for this.
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