A window to peek into the mind of a brilliant medical student who fits the description of bipolar disorder and or borderline personality. Yes, a flawed personality. But, what's perfection anyway? The naming of the illness is unfortunate and when one can make a leap over and look past that, it's all about emotional dysregulation. When it comes to the naming of the film, it's apt as it narrates the story of the namesake and does just that, without judging or glorifying. Here too, one needs to look past the reservations against profanity, substance abuse, sexual intercourse etc..and better yet, come to terms with all of the above. A romantic at heart, passionate about what he loves, an idealist who can be reckless, arrogant and entitled too. A person who can see what could be and is conflicted with what is and can't deal with the reality with a calm composure. One who has little tolerance towards nonsense and lives by high expectations. A perfectionist who isn't perfect. A bipolar journey, where your mood dictates. The intensity of emotions is high. The art of embracing emotions and doing what is effective is absent. There is no consistency, as in life. The behavior is out of scale to the triggers as per the usual norm. A parted love draws him into a sombre place; a departed soul shakes him and sorts him out.
Explosive, obsessive and compulsive, intolerant, substance-abusing, refusing help, humiliating people who help, belittling friends, failing to apologize - these just characterize his cries for help. When it comes to a medical surgery, he can get through successfully even when he is intoxicated. But when it comes to an emotion, he can't handle gracefully as expected by the society. His friend - who almost doubles as his therapist - knows his pain, helps him cope with the hurt especially when he doesn't like his choices or agree with his behavior and in spite of the insults he receives. He separates him from the behavior. It's hard to see that way and stay supportive. Which is what everyone deserves. Especially people with a mental illness need that kind of empathy to survive. It's hard to care for such an intelligent yet turbulent being. It's an imposition. There are no bad people, there is only bad behavior. There is always a cause. And a consequence. The lesson here is to understand pain, help to alleviate the suffering and then the biggest of them all...to forgive. It's all about empathy. He thinks he could have been a neurosurgeon if not for love and other distractions. I wish he were, he could've known the brain anatomy better, how his amygdala, hippocampus, insula or the prefrontal cortex work. The mere knowledge wouldn't help to prevent any behavior but that would definitely help handle the consequences better and might help manage his mental health better. A person who understands objectification of women and talks like a feminist, but at times, when it comes to his own love life, he acts like a predator, choosing his mate, making his moves, and marking his territory, almost abusive, dictating even who she needs to be friends with and violate her taking advantage of his senior status, almost coercing her to accept his stance. She doesn't fight back either and falls in love too. It almost feels like glorifying a lion and the lamb kind of a story. Almost doesn't count. So, let's give some benefit of the doubt. I wish there was more to the girl's characterization before their break up to clear any ambiguity.
In a society where you are expected not to lose your virginity until you are married, where the concept of dating is still frowned upon and the religion you're born into (whether observed or not), caste system (whether you care or not) and financial status of your parents (which is irrelevant), food habits (by birth or by choice) even become objections to love. PMS is mentioned (although the failed mention that it's not always physical), pre-marital sex which is still a taboo is depicted, this movie is a litmus test to a society that still attributes virginity to women even more so than men, also, pregnancy which is normally attributed to the mother rather than the couple. A society where a mother can almost never have a conversation with her girl along the lines "Have you guys kissed? Are you guys being safe?" Above all, the terms and technicalities of the subject of mental health are completely alien or beyond comprehension for those who don't have first person exposure, which is the majority of such society. Despite the cinematic cop-out of a climax (except for the strength of the character to accept the baby before the truth is revealed ), it's not after all a promise to a "happily lived ever after" life. There will be more episodes in his life or he may not relapse at all. That's the nature of such disorders. There is no taking control or grit when comes to the ways of a brain. People do need to understand this. More than any other emotion, anger is the most complicated to fathom and to accept. Knowledge is out there for those who seek but wisdom is not a guarantee. And dare I say, this story holds true with a female protagonist too. A bipolar woman breaking up with her partner, suffering through the aftermath, making choices against the norm ...pregnant or not, who tries to move on or not, gets back together or not..it's all the same.
I dream of the day when the world is no longer in need of feminism. I dream of the day when the intangible pain of the mind is given the same credence as bodily pain, if not more, and any disorder is mentioned without a negative connotation, and the stigma around mental illness truly disappears, and seeking therapy need not be a secret, resulting in better mental health.
Explosive, obsessive and compulsive, intolerant, substance-abusing, refusing help, humiliating people who help, belittling friends, failing to apologize - these just characterize his cries for help. When it comes to a medical surgery, he can get through successfully even when he is intoxicated. But when it comes to an emotion, he can't handle gracefully as expected by the society. His friend - who almost doubles as his therapist - knows his pain, helps him cope with the hurt especially when he doesn't like his choices or agree with his behavior and in spite of the insults he receives. He separates him from the behavior. It's hard to see that way and stay supportive. Which is what everyone deserves. Especially people with a mental illness need that kind of empathy to survive. It's hard to care for such an intelligent yet turbulent being. It's an imposition. There are no bad people, there is only bad behavior. There is always a cause. And a consequence. The lesson here is to understand pain, help to alleviate the suffering and then the biggest of them all...to forgive. It's all about empathy. He thinks he could have been a neurosurgeon if not for love and other distractions. I wish he were, he could've known the brain anatomy better, how his amygdala, hippocampus, insula or the prefrontal cortex work. The mere knowledge wouldn't help to prevent any behavior but that would definitely help handle the consequences better and might help manage his mental health better. A person who understands objectification of women and talks like a feminist, but at times, when it comes to his own love life, he acts like a predator, choosing his mate, making his moves, and marking his territory, almost abusive, dictating even who she needs to be friends with and violate her taking advantage of his senior status, almost coercing her to accept his stance. She doesn't fight back either and falls in love too. It almost feels like glorifying a lion and the lamb kind of a story. Almost doesn't count. So, let's give some benefit of the doubt. I wish there was more to the girl's characterization before their break up to clear any ambiguity.
In a society where you are expected not to lose your virginity until you are married, where the concept of dating is still frowned upon and the religion you're born into (whether observed or not), caste system (whether you care or not) and financial status of your parents (which is irrelevant), food habits (by birth or by choice) even become objections to love. PMS is mentioned (although the failed mention that it's not always physical), pre-marital sex which is still a taboo is depicted, this movie is a litmus test to a society that still attributes virginity to women even more so than men, also, pregnancy which is normally attributed to the mother rather than the couple. A society where a mother can almost never have a conversation with her girl along the lines "Have you guys kissed? Are you guys being safe?" Above all, the terms and technicalities of the subject of mental health are completely alien or beyond comprehension for those who don't have first person exposure, which is the majority of such society. Despite the cinematic cop-out of a climax (except for the strength of the character to accept the baby before the truth is revealed ), it's not after all a promise to a "happily lived ever after" life. There will be more episodes in his life or he may not relapse at all. That's the nature of such disorders. There is no taking control or grit when comes to the ways of a brain. People do need to understand this. More than any other emotion, anger is the most complicated to fathom and to accept. Knowledge is out there for those who seek but wisdom is not a guarantee. And dare I say, this story holds true with a female protagonist too. A bipolar woman breaking up with her partner, suffering through the aftermath, making choices against the norm ...pregnant or not, who tries to move on or not, gets back together or not..it's all the same.
I dream of the day when the world is no longer in need of feminism. I dream of the day when the intangible pain of the mind is given the same credence as bodily pain, if not more, and any disorder is mentioned without a negative connotation, and the stigma around mental illness truly disappears, and seeking therapy need not be a secret, resulting in better mental health.