cricket30 Review of Snow-White

Snow-White (1933)

There is no indication that the erstwhile title character of this version . . .

[7/10 · 6 February 2020]

. . . of SNOW-WHITE--"Betty"--has any access at all to firearms. When a child is cooped up with an unstable step-parent prone to spewing out such invective as "Off with her head!!" it's incumbent upon a caring Society to insure that such young ones are packing heat at all times. IF an evil stepmother KNOWS that her princess daughter has an arsenal of shooting irons--preferably including several military-style assault rifles--safely tucked under her bed and pillow, it's far less likely that such jealous jerks will feel free to condemn their kid for such petty and frivolous reasons. Lacking so much as a trusty Derringer, Betty is seized by the nefarious Queen's henchmen and affixed to a tree to await her noggin lopping. Though she escapes the executioner's blade, this miraculous delivery from an involuntary pruning comes at the cost of being frozen into a block of ice! Betty could be spared ALL of this horrendous trauma IF her animators had possessed the foresight to equip her with some sort of a gat! So watch SNOW-WHITE, and then run out to show your support for BANGS (Broke Americans Need Gun Stamps)!