Review of Lavender

Lavender (I) (2016)
3/10
The silliest thing about this movie...
30 June 2023
The movie begins by letting us know that the main character's family was killed when she was young, and that she was found in the house, crouched in the corner holding a pocket razor. Basically the movie then serves to unfold the mystery of what happened all those years ago.

The movie is incredibly slow. I found myself doing that "come on, wrap it up" gesture at the screen on more than one occasion where the camera was just pointed at Abbie Cornish's face, while she stood there looking sad or scared for WAY TOO LONG. I don't require a superhero movie to stay engaged, but the pace on this thing was like watching hair grow.

Like some other reviewers, I also questioned the "look" of Abbie Cornish's character. She certainly didn't look like a photographer. She looked like she was going to a barn dance, every day. I usually don't feel that annoyed by a character's wardrobe, but in this case that darn denim jacket got SO old it was distracting.

That aside, the plot unfolds in a pretty silly way. There isn't much consistency to the supernatural aspects (I am fine suspending disbelief for supernatural stuff -- but please establish some rules instead of having everyone do totally random things!).

By far the SILLIEST thing about this movie, though, is when we get to find out "what really happened." It was 1985 when this multiple murder took place, and the police couldn't put together what happened?? Once you see everything play out on the screen, it's obvious that even a random person off the street examining the bodies could give a fairly good guess. The specific types of injuries (or lack thereof) would make everything pretty obvious.

In short, it isn't a mysterious crime at all, so the police would ABSOLUTELY have figured it out and narrowed in on the killer quite easily. I hate having to suspend THAT much disbelief, so I felt cheated at the end, rather than rewarded for my patience sitting through all of those long, slow scenes.

It's not the worst movie I've ever seen, but there are a LOT of other good things I'd recommend putting ahead of this on your watchlist.
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