The Hammer (2007)
Adam Carolla: Jerry Ferro
Photos
Quotes
-
Jerry Ferro : Yeah, coach, when is the black man finally gonna get a fair shake in the fight game?
-
Jerry Ferro : Who hangs a heavy bag with toggle bolts?
-
Jerry Ferro : You guys sure seem to love Nicaragua except for the part where you risked your lives not to live there any more.
-
Oswaldo Sanchez : Jerry! Jerry! Wake up, man! You missing the tryouts, man!
Jerry Ferro : [sleeping] I'll do the Olympics next time...
-
Jerry Ferro : Do you have taquitos?
Roach Coach Lady : Taquitos?
Jerry Ferro : Hey, if you said spaghetti I wouldn't be confused. Taquitos!
-
Coach Bell : So what are you?
Jerry Ferro : Well, up until 2 hours ago, I was a carpenter.
Coach Bell : So you still have your amateur status?
Jerry Ferro : Not as a carpenter.
-
Coach Bell : You know, I've seen guys like you before. You're one of those 95 percenters who never quite gives it everything he's got.
Jerry Ferro : Actually, I'm a 75 percenter who's giving **you** an extra 20 percent.
Coach Bell : Get out of here.
-
Jerry Ferro : What are you building?
Woman Who Argues With Jerry : Storage shed.
Jerry Ferro : What are you siding it with?
Woman Who Argues With Jerry : T-111.
Jerry Ferro : ...You gotta be careful with that T-111. You wanna get the margins right, you know. They have a T&G joint. Wanna get it just right.
Woman Who Argues With Jerry : If by T&G you mean tongue and groove, you're wrong. The T-111 has a shiplap seam.
Jerry Ferro : I'm pretty sure it's T&G. I've worked with it a lot.
Woman Who Argues With Jerry : No. No. It's shiplap.
Jerry Ferro : Well, let's talk foundation bolting. What are you holding the bottom plate down to the slab with.
Woman Who Argues With Jerry : Redheads.
Jerry Ferro : Oh, you're going with wedge anchors. Yeah, I'd go with J bolts. I'd put 'em in when the slab was wet. That way, I wouldn't have to bust out the roto hammer.
Woman Who Argues With Jerry : Well, if I was going with a footing, I'd use the J bolts but we have a 4-inch slab, so...
Jerry Ferro : [arrogantly] Cut corners, people get hurt.
Woman Who Argues With Jerry : It's a tool shed. It's not an underground parking structure.
Jerry Ferro : [mock outrage] Okay. We're in earthquake country. I don't know if you heard.
Woman Who Argues With Jerry : So what you building...
Jerry Ferro : ...I'm building a deck for my lady...
Woman Who Argues With Jerry : What you screwing it off with, deckers?
Jerry Ferro : No, using 16-penny galvanized common heads.
Woman Who Argues With Jerry : Oh, you get a hell of a lot more grab with a core-stripped bugle head zinc drywall screw.
Jerry Ferro : I hit.690 in the Van Nuys Unlimited Arc League.
Woman Who Argues With Jerry : All-American, Arizona state.
Jerry Ferro : Ozzie!
Oswaldo Sanchez : Yeah?
Jerry Ferro : [Quietly] Let's get those uh... Let's get those drywall screws.
-
Jerry Ferro : Look at these kids, they look pissed off that they're not at Disneyland. I would sue my parents if they took me here.
-
Jerry Ferro : [opening voice over] They say you should never let go of your dreams. But if your dream is to be a Mouseketeer, and you're 45, you may want to let that one go. On the other hand, if your dream is to be a Wal-Mart greeter, you can hang on to that baby until like a year after you die. Me? I don't even know what my dream is, but it's all right. I've got time. I won't be turning forty for another...
[alarm clock begins beeping]
Jerry Ferro : Ugh! I just turned forty.
-
Jerry Ferro : That's good. Take that energy, take that hostility and harness it. Use it. You've got the Eye of the Asshole, my brother.
-
Jerry Ferro : A good fart would take this thing down.
-
Jerry Ferro : I'd have kicked your ass but calling me middle class is about the nicest thing anyone's ever said to me.
-
Jerry Ferro : I don't know. I've seen some of those guys. They're pretty ripped.
Jeff : Come on, you think I'm gonna lose to a guy who enters the ring to Barbara Streisand?
Jerry Ferro : Uhh, I think you'd lose to Barbara Streisand.
-
Malice Blake : That was a slip, motherfucker! Don't go saying you knocked Malice Blake to the canvas.
Jerry Ferro : [Turns to face Malice Blake's entourage] Did you fellas see me knock Malice Blake to the canvas?
-
Coach Bell : This guy was not the number one ranked amateur five years ago for nothing.
Jerry Ferro : What's he been doing for the last five years?
Coach Bell : He's been doing five years.
-
Jerry Ferro : He'll be punched out by the tenth round, coach.
Oswaldo Sanchez : It's only a four-round fight.
Jerry Ferro : Oh, thank Christ, 'cause I'm gassed.
-
Jerry Ferro : But it's Saturday.
Lindsay Pratt : Crime doesn't take weekends off, I'm afraid.
Jerry Ferro : You're so butch.