"The Big Bang Theory" The Workplace Proximity (TV Episode 2013) Poster

Jim Parsons: Sheldon Cooper

Photos 

Quotes 

  • Bernadette Rostenkowski : Well?

    Howard Wolowitz : Okay, fine. I did say that, and I think it's true. I think if we work together and live together, we'd get sick of each other.

    Sheldon Cooper : Yeah, but to be fair, he only said the part about him getting sick of you.

    Howard Wolowitz : [angrily]  For the love of God, why?

    Bernadette Rostenkowski : [Sheldon awkwardly heads towards Leonard and Raj on the couch]  What exactly do you think you'd get sick of?

    Raj Koothrappali : [speaking quietly to Leonard]  His only options here are to fake a heart attack or have a real one.

    Howard Wolowitz : It's nothing in particular. I...

    Bernadette Rostenkowski : Is it my voice? Am I too bossy?

    Howard Wolowitz : [he rubs his right arm]  My arm is feeling numb.

    Leonard Hofstadter : [to Raj]  Nailed it.

    Bernadette Rostenkowski : That's the wrong arm for a heart attack, Doofus.

  • Sheldon Cooper : I appreciate your concern, but I won't be seeing any more of Amy than I already do. I assume we'll deduct any extra time we spend together at work from our weekly quota.

    Leonard Hofstadter : Please let me be there when you tell her that.

    Sheldon Cooper : Why? So you can see the look on Amy's face when she hears my top-notch idea?

    Leonard Hofstadter : Please, oh please, just let me be there.

  • [first lines] 

    Penny : Awkward silence, Sheldon on his phone, no touching, somebody's having date night.

    Amy Farrah Fowler : It's actually steamier than it looks; Sheldon's looking up the phallic symbolism of root vegetables in Renaissance paintings.

    Sheldon Cooper : Oh, no, I got bored with that; I'm just browsing cuticle scissors on Amazon.

    Penny : How do you not tear off his clothes and take him right here on this table?

    Sheldon Cooper : If you do that, I'll scream.

  • Sheldon Cooper : [knock knock knock]  Amy-Bernadette-Penny.

    [knock knock knock] 

    Sheldon Cooper : Amy-Bernadette-Penny.

    [knock knock knock] 

    Sheldon Cooper : Amy-Bernadette-Penny.

    Bernadette Rostenkowski : He's never going to stop doing that, is he?

    Amy Farrah Fowler : I don't mind. I'm hoping to put his love of repetition to good use some day.

  • Sheldon Cooper : [Knock... knock... knock]  . Amy.

    [Knock... knock... knock] 

    Sheldon Cooper : . Amy.

    [Knock... knock... knock] 

    Sheldon Cooper : . Amy.

    Amy Farrah Fowler : Sheldon, what are you doing here so late?

    Sheldon Cooper : I couldn't sleep because I kept thinking about what happened earlier between us. Also I had one heck of a bus nap. Oh speaking of which. Do you want some mutton and coconut milk?

    Amy Farrah Fowler : No.

    Sheldon Cooper : Boy, I cannot give this stuff away.

    Amy Farrah Fowler : What do you want?

    Sheldon Cooper : Amy, this isn't easy to say. All relationships are difficult, but even more so when you're in one with a person who struggles with everyday social interactions and frankly who can strike some people as being kind of a weirdo.

    Amy Farrah Fowler : Sheldon, you're not a weirdo.

    Sheldon Cooper : I wasn't speaking about me. I mean honestly, there's no telling what will set you off. You know, introducing myself as your boyfriend. Giving you the opportunity to drive me home. Breaking the ice with your colleagues using ethnic humor, you're funniest kind of humor.

    Amy Farrah Fowler : What's your point?

    Sheldon Cooper : My point is we're a couple and I like you for who you are quirks and all.

    Amy Farrah Fowler : I like you too.

    Sheldon Cooper : I should hope so. I don't see anyone else banging on this door to put up with your nonsense.

    [Amy slams the door in his face] 

    Sheldon Cooper : Not even a goodbye. You see, that's the kind of thing that makes people think you're weird. Poor kid, she just doesn't see it.

  • Sheldon Cooper : That was before Howard explained to me how awful it would be if he had to work with his significant other.

    Bernadette Rostenkowski : He said what?

    Sheldon Cooper : Oh don't be insulted. He just thinks too much of you would be mind-numbingly tedious.

  • Amy Farrah Fowler : And this is Dr. Gunderson from Stockholm.

    Sheldon Cooper : Aw, Sweden. Home of my favorite Muppet and second favorite meatball. OK. The Nordic reputation for a lack of humor is well founded. Wait. Is his name Gunderson or No-Funderson?

    Amy Farrah Fowler : Where are we going with this, Dr. Cooper?

    Sheldon Cooper : Oh, please. I'm your boyfriend. Call me Sheldon. That's right. I'm in a boy-girl relationship with this cute little lump of wool.

    Amy Farrah Fowler : Sheldon.

    Sheldon Cooper : It is a physical relationship too. Hand holding; hugging; even on hot days. Ow! Here's an new one. Apparently now we kick each other in the shin under the table. How do you like it when I do it to you? Not so much, huh?

  • Howard Wolowitz : Listen to me. Sheldon misunderstood. What I meant was if we worked together, there'd be too much of me for you, not the other way around.

    Sheldon Cooper : Howard, if you're going to lie to your wife, you don't start the sentence with "Sheldon misunderstood". That's a dead giveaway.

  • Amy Farrah Fowler : This project would have us working in close proximity to one another, and there's the vulgar adage that one should not defecate where one eats.

    Sheldon Cooper : My father used to say that all the time. That and um, "who does one have to orally gratify to get a drink around here?" But what does that have to do with you working at the university?

    Amy Farrah Fowler : Sheldon, don't defecate where you eat means don't have a romantic relationship in the workplace.

    Sheldon Cooper : Really!

    Amy Farrah Fowler : Yes.

    Sheldon Cooper : Hnh. I always took it literally. That's why I have never once moved my bowels in this or any restaurant.

    Amy Farrah Fowler : I'm relieved that you don't have a problem with us working together.

    Sheldon Cooper : Not as relieved as I'm about to be. It's a brave new world, little lady.

    [he heads toward the washroom] 

  • Amy Farrah Fowler : And this is Dr. Gunderson from Stockholm.

    Sheldon Cooper : Ja-ah, Sweden. The home of my favorite Muppet and uh second favorite meatball.

    [Amy and Gunderson just stare at him] 

    Sheldon Cooper : OK. The Nordic reputation for lack of humor is well founded.

    [Amy and Gunderson look at each other] 

    Sheldon Cooper : Boy, is his name Gunderson or Nofunderson?

  • Penny : Sheldon, what happened between you and Amy?

    Sheldon Cooper : Well, can you believe she said I embarrassed her?

    Penny : Yeah.

    Sheldon Cooper : But you didn't even hear the details.

    Leonard Hofstadter : Sheldon, I've known you a long time, and I'm going to tell you this with all the love I can possibly muster: Amy's right, you're wrong.

    Sheldon Cooper : But you don't even know...

    Leonard Hofstadter : Doesn't matter.

    Sheldon Cooper : Well, yeah, but in my defense...

    Leonard Hofstadter : Doesn't matter.

    Sheldon Cooper : You're not listening to my side of it.

    Penny : OK, fine, Sheldon, what is your side?

    Sheldon Cooper : [sighs]  Well...

    Penny : No, gotta go with Amy on this one.

  • Amy Farrah Fowler : What do you want?

    Sheldon Cooper : Amy, This isn't easy to say. All relationships are difficult. But even more so when you're in one with a person who struggles with everyday social interactions, and frankly who can strike some people as being kind of a weirdo.

    Amy Farrah Fowler : Sheldon, you're not a weirdo.

    Sheldon Cooper : I wasn't speaking about me. I mean, honestly, there's no telling what will set you off. Now, uh, introducing myself as your boyfriend, giving you the opportunity to drive me home. Breaking the ice with your colleagues using ethnic humor, the funniest kind of humor.

    Amy Farrah Fowler : What's your point?

    Sheldon Cooper : My point is we're a couple, and I like you for who you are. Quirks and all.

    Amy Farrah Fowler : I like you too.

    Sheldon Cooper : I should hope so. I don't see anyone else banging on this door to put up with your nonsense.

    [she closes the door in his face] 

    Sheldon Cooper : [through the door]  Not even a good-bye. You see, that's the kind of thing makes people think you're weird.

    Sheldon Cooper : [to himself]  Poor kid. She just doesn't see it.

  • [last lines] 

    Leonard Hofstadter : Laser's warmed up.

    Howard Wolowitz : Pull!

    [Raj throws up a balloon, which Howard bursts using the laser] 

    Leonard Hofstadter , Howard Wolowitz , Raj Koothrappali , Sheldon Cooper : Yay!

  • Sheldon Cooper : You sure your moth-like personality won't be drawn to this blazing fire that is myself?

  • Sheldon Cooper : Maybe your friend Gunderson needs to head over to IKEA and assemble a sense of humor.

  • Raj Koothrappali : You know, my parents met at his place of work.

    Sheldon Cooper : Your father's a gynecologist.

    Raj Koothrappali : I know; what started as a pap smear turned into a date. Which turned into her working there, which turned into marriage, which then turned into hatred which continues to this day.

See also

Release Dates | Official Sites | Company Credits | Filming & Production | Technical Specs


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