The Big Bang Theory (TV Series)

The Clean Room Infiltration (2014)

Jim Parsons: Sheldon Cooper

Photos 

Quotes 

• Bernadette Rostenkowski : I think the nicest gifts I've got from Howie show how well he knows me.

  Sheldon Cooper : Hm. Let's see. What do I know about Amy? She loves medieval literature. Chaucer's her favorite. Her eyes sparkle when she watches old French movies. I enjoy how harp music causes her fingers to dance as if she's playing along.

  Bernadette Rostenkowski : Wow. You really do love her.

  Sheldon Cooper : I do. Now, let's find the kind of gift that makes her feel small and worthless.

• Bernadette Rostenkowski : [Was singing to "Santa Claus Is Coming To Town" when Sheldon turns off the radio]  Why did you turn it off?

  Sheldon Cooper : Because in the last ten minutes, Santa Claus came to town, kissed Mommy and ran Grandma over with a reindeer. I have a drunk uncle who did all those things and no one sings songs about him.

  Bernadette Rostenkowski : Well, maybe it would help if you thought of him as a superhero whose superpower is bringing joy to children.

  Sheldon Cooper : My uncle did that too. It turned out to be legal in Oklahoma.

• Amy Farrah Fowler : I've always wanted to do a traditional Victorian Christmas: parlor games, goose, and figgy pudding...

  Sheldon Cooper : Yuck! English pudding! You get yourself all excited for pudding, and here comes a cake with raisins in it. I'm not going.

  Amy Farrah Fowler : You're going.

  Sheldon Cooper : Why do you hate me?

  Amy Farrah Fowler : I don't hate you, I love you.

  Sheldon Cooper : Well, you call it "love", but it has a lot of raisins in it.

• [Opening lines] 

  Amy Farrah Fowler : How are your parents doing, Raj?

  Raj Koothrappali : Not good. They hired attorneys to speak to each other.

  Sheldon Cooper : Speaking of attorneys, you know who I wouldn't hire to represent me in court? She-Hulk.

  Penny : You almost stayed in topic. Good for you.

  Amy Farrah Fowler : Wait, She-Hulk is a lawyer?

  Howard Wolowitz : Yeah. She works at a lawfirm in New York.

  Sheldon Cooper : And she's the only monster in the firm. Between you, me and the walls, I think she was an affirmative action hire.

• Santa : Let me see if I got this straight. A picture of you on my lap is a way of punishing your girlfriend for making you celebrate Christmas?

  Sheldon Cooper : Correct.

  Santa : Santa thinks dating you is punishment enough.

  Sheldon Cooper : There's an argument for that, but I want to make sure.